Mending Fences, yet Burning Bridges
by happydemonhobo
Summary: Complete:Picks up after Life goes on:Or so you Thought:Hiei's had a taste of what Youko has to offer, what happens to Kurama when the fire demon's taste turns to cravings. Kurama:Youko & Hiei. Yaoi.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho…they belong to their creator and such…

Summary: Picks up after **Life Goes On…or so you thought**: Hiei's had a taste of what Youko has to offer, what happens to Kurama when the fire demon's taste turns to cravings.

Rated: **M**

**Mending Fences, yet Burning Bridges**

Chapter 1

'_Six months……six long months.' Six months since they defeated Taiga, six months since Yusuke's wedding, six months since the oaf proposed to Yukina and six months since he'd started a relationship with Youko._

Hiei sat in a tree outside Genkai's temple contemplating those thoughts. He had no idea where to start, even if he did, he didn't know how to explain them. And the more he found himself getting into this state, the more he found himself in the tree outside the temple watching his sister, Yukina, as she did her daily chores.

He thought at first coming here to the temple and watching his sister would help his thoughts. Watching her had always calmed him and gave him the ability to clear his mind. But after a visit, he noticed the ring on her finger and knew Kuwabara had proposed. This only added more to his already filled mind. He finally got that thought to the bottom of the list as he told himself that he trusted the orange haired, though he would never say it out loud and Yukina did seem happier, which in his mind was all that mattered, her happiness.

After seeing the ring, Hiei had went and talked to Kurama, asking him if he knew of the proposal. 'Yes', had been the answer, followed by the same old talk. "Hiei, you know now would be a good time to tell her. She has her friends to help with the wedding plans, but family would be better. And you know if she knew, she would have you walk her down the aisle and give her away." This led into a conversation that went back to Yusuke's wedding and how Keiko's father had walked her down the aisle as a show of acceptance to the marriage. He replied in an angered voice. "But I don't accept it." Leaving before the fox could continue his preaching. Kurama has not broached the subject since.

The first thing on his mind, the list per say, was his relationship with Youko and how it was affecting Kurama. It had been a really awkward few days after his first night with Youko and, in a way, was still awkward even after six months. The thing that bothered the fire demon the most was, Kurama would not talk about it. The only comment the red head made was the morning after the first night. "Youko says he will wait patiently and that all you need to do is ask." When asked how he felt about that, Kurama just shrugged and said. "I agreed and I will not go back on my word." Hiei wanted to investigate further, for he knew there was more to it. The problem was getting the stubborn red head to talk and again, six months later, the fox has not said a word and it wasn't for the lack of trying either.

On the outside, Kurama seemed to display that everything was 'normal' in their relationship. Normal, as in they did all the things they had done since getting together. Spending time and sparring, going out, watching TV and dinning. Hiei did however notice that Kurama was keeping a tight hold on his thoughts, not even communicating mentally much.

Though after a lot of 'beating around the bush' so to speak, they'd agreed to a routine. Youko would come out on the night of the full moon. Thus Hiei has been with Youko six more times, to this date. The cave idea had been abandoned after their first time there. The reason being, Kurama's, or should it be Shuiichi's, emotional state, he would have to walk there, let Youko out and then he'd have to walk back in the morning. This was not helping the red head to accept the arrangements, so they stayed in the apartment. Hiei didn't know if that was for the best or not.

He found himself thinking about the silver yoko at times. He thought back to the last time they had been together. After Youko had his way with him, he'd offered himself to the fire demon. Which you could say 'shocked' the small demon, but he returned the pleasures and that was that. The two never talked, they would just fall asleep and sometime after that, Kurama would reappear and thus they would start their day. Kurama would sometimes go to work or he would get up and run errands, leaving the fire demon to sleep or do his own thing. Nothing was ever said about the night before.

Hiei could not deny that he was enjoying the spirit yoko, he liked the sex, not saying that sex with Kurama was boring, it just was not the roughness he liked. The red head was passionate, wanting to take things slow and gentle. Kurama also wanted to talk afterwards, while snuggling, where as he just wanted to sleep. Youko didn't by all means take things slow. He was a torture, have his way, then fall asleep, which was the way Hiei was use to. Demons didn't care for the emotional end of sex. It was for relieving tension, or for getting their way with someone, that was about it. Ningens seem to have emotional baggage and it applied to the Kurama as well. It had to do with his ningen side, was what Hiei had come to accept. Thus this line of thinking led to his sexual relationship with Kurama. Hiei would give into Kurama, letting him be on top so as to please the ningen side, but that had changed. When Kurama realized that Youko was the seme, he started letting Hiei be seme to him, saying it was only fair. Again the stubborn red head would not talk about why he'd changed his mind. Hiei had still not figured out why the red head had agreed to the arrangement in the first place.

The fire demon wondered sometimes why he fell in love with Kurama, preferring him for companionship, but yet only wanted the spirit yoko for sex. Maybe it was because he had become use to the red head's persona, having never known Youko. He will admit to only a hand full of people that he had changed since meeting Kurama and then later Yusuke and the others, but he could not get the demon side out of him when it came to sex and Kurama can not fill that void, yet.

He let out a big sigh, rubbing the bridge of his nose at the headache that was forming. It never failed. He always got a headache when his thoughts were flashing in a never ending flicker, like a slideshow on fast forward. Looking up at the sky, he realized it was getting late and that he had spent most of the day in the tree thinking, with absolutely nothing being solved, except getting the headache. 'Kurama should be home soon.' He told himself. After taking one last look at Yukina in the garden with the birds, he flittered off.

End Chapter 1

At the end of each chapter will be a song that I've come to associate with the story…not an any particular order. Though you may notice I listened to a lot of Linkin Park.

Lyrics to the song: _**Headstrong**_** - **by: _Earshot_

Strapped down and heavy…Tied up and bound…This weight I carry…This weight I've found. So let…me…be the one to say, I've really had enough.

(Course)

Down fallen on (Yes you meant the world to me)…My sweet love…So headstrong (Are you?) Strong

Watch me…fall

One time too many…You've let me down…Won't think what could be…Can't feel much now

Watch me…change this world inside of you

Does it really mean that much to you…To hide your fear, to test the way I feel

Watch me fall…Watch me break…Watch me crawl…Watch me throw it all away

I can't believe the things you say…So wrong for how I feel this way…I'm sleeping to relieve this strain so…Calmly, slowly, softly, just let it all just drift away.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

'_Six months……Six long months.' Six months since they defeated Taiga, six months since Yusuke's wedding, six months since Kuwabara proposed to Yukina and six months since Hiei had started a relationship with Youko._

Deciding to play hooky and leave work after lunch, Kurama found himself walking down a busy sidewalk. He wasn't even paying attention to where he was walking and had to apology several times for bumping into someone. His mind was full of thoughts and they were slowing eating at him.

His subconscious must have realized what he needed, for when he stopped to look at a display in a store front window. He realized the blow up palm tree he was looking at was part of a familiar display. Having walked almost a mile from work, he was now standing in front of Yusuke's restaurant. Shrugging his subconscious, he went in. Entering the restaurant was like walking into another world, well if that's what you considered Hawaii. The whole place had been turned into a luau of sorts. Anything even remotely Hawaiian was hanging, sitting, taped on walls or in the windows. Along with two beige grass skirts hanging above the kitchen door, complete with two matching pink/red leis made of fake flowers.

Making his way to the counter area and taking a seat on a stool, he looked around, noticing the place was relatively empty since it was after lunch. There was a group of four men in one corner, dressed in business suits, who were still in a heated discussion about a problem they were trying to solve, their lunch long since eaten, except for a half full pot of coffee.

Glancing to the other side, Kurama saw Yusuke sitting at a table with a man who was also in a business suit. On the table in front of them was an open briefcase with papers strung about.

Turning back to the counter, the red head was about to pick up a menu, when Keiko came out of the kitchen.

"Well, hello there, stranger." She said, grabbing a cup and saucer to make tea. She was wearing a very colorful muumuu that covered her round belly. She had been very strict as to how much weight she gained so far and it showed in the fact that she was 'all baby.'

"Hello…how are you feeling?" He asked.

"I'm doing pretty well, though I don't see you missing work just to come and ask me that." She said with a smile, placing the cup of tea in front of him.

Taking a sip, Kurama smiled back. "I decided to take a walk and I guess my subconscious told me a needed a cup of tea." He said, toasting her with the cup.

"Well, Yusuke should be done in a minute. We've dealt with him before." She said, motioning with her head to the man.

Kurama's eyebrow went up.

"Sorry." She said, realizing the red head didn't know who the man was. "He's in advertising and is going to run a few ads in the paper for us." She told him.

"I think you two are pretty much established, why worry." Kurama said, taking another sip.

"It doesn't hurt to run ads every few months, just to let people know we're still here. Also to get tourists and maybe attract some new people." She said, starting to grab empty cups and plates off the counter and putting them on a tray.

Kurama looked back over when he felt Yusuke look his way. The raven haired casually displayed a 'thumbs up' with his folded arms and managed to look him right in the eyes.

Kurama got the meaning and reached for his wallet, after placing a few dollars on the counter, he stood up. Keiko came back over.

"He'll be up in a few." She said, taking the money. It had long since been settled about him paying for his food. The short battle had been won, by him of course. She walked over to the register, causing the dancing bobble hula girl, stuck to the top, to wiggle her hips when it opened.

Looking at the four men in the corner, who were still in a heated discussion, oblivious to the outside world, Kurama headed to an unmarked door behind the counter.

Whispering a few words in Keiko's ear and rubbing her belly, Yusuke soon followed his red headed friend to the roof. Every time he came up here to have a talk with the man, it reminded him of the first talk they'd had on the roof of the hospital. Only instead of seeing a purplish school uniform, it was a business suit.

"So what's up fox-boy?" Yusuke asked as the door closed behind him. Not seeing the red head cringe at the 'fox-boy' part. "Haven't seen you in awhile, everything okay with Hiei?"

"I guess so." Kurama said, not bothering to turn around from where he stood in the corner looking down at the traffic.

"You don't sound so sure. Has Youko been causing problems?" Yusuke asked as he came to stand by his friend and look out over the city.

"No." Kurama said with a slight shake of his head. "That there lies the problem. He still has not talked to me since that first night." He told him. After that first night when the red head stopped watching the two to go and comfort Shuiichi, the spirit yoko had stopped communications with him. The six other times Youko has been out, he has forced Kurama to go and stay with Shuiichi, so he had no idea what was going on with the two, or how the relationship was going. After a night together, Youko would tell him he could come out and that was it. He knew something physical had happened, for his body would be sore and tired in the morning. He also knew something different had happened this last time because when he woke up, his back and thighs were hurting. Since Hiei never talked about the nights he was with the spirit yoko, he didn't say anything either.

"You need to talk to him." Yusuke said.

"Which one?" Kurama muttered. He couldn't help it.

"Funny." Yusuke said, rolling his eyes and turning to face one of his best friends. "You need to let Hiei know that this is bothering you. How's Hiei acting now?" He asked.

"He seems to be eager for the full moon, like he can't wait for Youko." Kurama said, still looking down.

"So you think he's becoming more attracted to him." Yusuke said, crossing his arms.

"I think so." The red head shrugged. "Hiei's more content the next morning and happier. I do not know what happens when they are together, but Hiei seems to like it more and more." There was a little sadness in his voice.

"Is he avoiding you?" Yusuke asked, hearing the sadness.

"Not really." Kurama shrugged. "He likes my company and likes doing things with me. That has not changed." He said, finally looking at the raven haired.

"I know it's none of my business and you don't have to answer, but what I meant was the physical end. Is he still comforting you and giving into your needs?" Yusuke asked, he really didn't want to hear the details of a male/ male relationship, but he was worried about the red head and wanted to help.

"Yes…saving you the details…let's just say I made a decision about how it should be." Kurama said, letting a soft, nervous, smile show.

"Well, you still need to talk, maybe make a dinner and spill your guts…you can't go on like this…I mean it's like some sort of love triangle." Yusuke said and ran his hand through his hair in frustration.

"That is exactly what I asked." Kurama said, his smile getting wider as he remembered asking the fire demon that question.

"You know you can always put an end to it." Yusuke said seriously.

"I agreed to this situation." Kurama said, losing the smile. "And Hiei seems to be happy. I can not offer him what he wants right now." He turned his gaze back to the city.

"Do you think you will ever be able to give him what he wants and what if he starts wanting more?" Yusuke asked.

Kurama shrugged, still looking down.

The door to the roof opened and a man leaned his head out. "Sorry to bother you, but Ms. Keiko needs you, no real hurry she said, but…"

Yusuke cut him off. "That's okay…tell her I'll be there in a minute." The man nodded and shut the door.

"Go." Kurama said, ending the conversation.

"Well come back if you want to talk." Yusuke said, making his way to the door. "And stay as long as you need." He added when he opened the door.

Kurama gave a short nod as Yusuke turned and headed down, the door closing behind him.

The red head didn't know how long he stayed on the roof, for he didn't know what time he had even made it to the restaurant. Looking up to see the sun on the horizon, he hurried down and quietly left. He still had to go back to work and get his car before heading home.

End Chapter 2

Lyrics to the song: _**Shades of Gray**_** - **by: _The Monkees_

When the world and I was young…Just yesterday…Life was such a simple game, a child could play.

It was easy then to tell right from wrong…Easy then to tell weak from strong…When a man should stand and fight, or just go along.

(Course)

But today there is no day or night…Today there is no dark or light…Today there is no black or white…Only shades of gray.

I remember when the answers seemed so clear…We had never lived with doubt or tasted fear…It was easy then to tell truth from lies…Selling out from compromise…Who to love and who to hate…The foolish from the wise.

It was easy then to know what was fair…When to keep and when to share…How much to protect your heart…And how much to care.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

'_Six months……Six long months.' Six months since they defeated Taiga, six months since my wedding, six months since Kuwabara proposed to Yukina and six months since Hiei started a relationship with Youko._

"Yusuke…you coming to bed?" Keiko's voice came from the doorway to the bedroom.

"Not yet…" Yusuke answered back, looking up from the chair he sat in.

"Well at least turn on a light." She said, walking over and turning on a floor lamp that was next to the chair. When she turned on the lamp, she saw a distant look in the chocolate eyes. "Hey, are you alright?" She asked.

"Yeah…come here." Yusuke said, pulling the woman onto his lap where he started rubbing her neck and shoulders.

"Mmmm…that feels good." She said, closing her eyes and melting into the rubbing.

"By the way, I've been meaning to thank you for talking me into hiring the cleaning crew."

"No big." Yusuke said, continuing his rubbing and even repositioning her so he could rub her legs and feet. After Keiko's first trimester, Yusuke could tell it was wearing his wife out doing the cleaning in the evening. She would be on her feet all day from early in the morning to late in the evening and then spend half the night scrubbing, to get the place clean for the next day. He knew her parents had hired an evening cleaning crew to do their restaurant after they got tired of the same ordeal. So he talked her into it, on her terms that it would end once the baby was born, but Yusuke wasn't quite ready to commit to that, he kind of liked closing the restaurant and turning it over to someone else to clean so he could enjoy the evening and was looking forward to having that time with the baby once it came.

"Go…you're falling asleep." Yusuke said, stopping.

"If I must." Keiko teased. "Don't stay up to late okay." She added as she closed the door to the bedroom.

Yusuke reached over and turned off the light, he preferred to think in the dark.

His thoughts were on one of his best friends and the problem he felt he'd started with a simple comment and now he didn't know how to fix it.

_**(flashback…after the wedding)**_

"I have thought about going to the Makai once in awhile to let him be free. Maybe it will release some tension." Kurama said.

"Instead of that, you should ask Hiei to help." Yusuke suggested. "There's many ways to release tension and maybe Youko and him can get better acquainted." He paused and studied the red head, not getting a response, he said. "That is…if you don't have a problem with it." He followed it by giving a cheesy smile and a wink.

"Yusuke." Kurama gasped and couldn't control the pink appearing on his cheeks.

"Hiei needs to accept you and Youko." The raven haired said bluntly. "He has to realize he can't have one without the other and he can't blame you for what that vain fox does. Like you told me, he needs to love, honor and cherish." He said with seriousness in his voice.

_**(end flashback)**_

What Yusuke didn't know until later, was that Kurama took his advice. He was glad, until he realized the problems and the affects it was having on the red head. It was hard to understand, though Kurama tried to explain.

_**(flashback…two weeks after the honeymoon)**_

Yusuke looked up from the counter as he heard a knock on the front door. It was early in the morning and the restaurant was not yet open. Seeing the figure with flaming red hair, Yusuke walked over and unlocked the door. Kurama slid in so the door could be locked behind him.

"Sorry Yusuke…is this a bad time?" The red head said, looking around the dark room. Only the flood lights and exit signs were glowing, along with the light from the door to the kitchen.

"Hey…you alright, you look a little flush?" Yusuke asked, motioning the red head to the counter.

"Long night." Kurama said, taking a seat.

Keiko came out of the kitchen carrying a tray of clean coffee cups. "Yusuke did you say something." She said, placing the tray next to the coffee pots.

"We have company." Yusuke answered and motioned to Kurama.

"Oh…hi….your up early….." She started, but seeing the distant look in his green eyes, she asked. "Are you alright?"

"Do I look that bad?" Kurama said with a, forced, soft smile.

"Let me get you a cup of tea…are you hungry…I can have something simple made up." She asked, grabbing a cup, a tea bag and one of the coffee pots that contained only hot water.

"Thank you. I will have the tea, but no on the food." Kurama replied.

Placing the cup in front of the red head, Keiko went over and turned on the main lights before unlocking the door and letting in two girls that worked the morning shift as waitresses. Almost immediately customers started filing in.

"So how have you been?" Yusuke asked. "Does the long night have anything to do with Hiei?" He was only joking, but the fox didn't take it that way.

"Yusuke…I can not believe you would ask me that." Kurama hissed.

"Hey…wahooo…it was just a joke…you get up on the wrong side of the bed this morning?" Yusuke said, throwing up his hands in mock surrender.

"Sorry." Kurama muttered, lowering his head.

"You want to talk?" Yusuke asked, placing his hands on the counter and lowering his head to look at his friend.

Looking around, Kurama saw the place getting busy and several people had taken seats at the counter near them. "I do not think this is an appropriate place to talk." He said, taking a sip of tea.

"No big…we'll head up." Yusuke said and used a 'thumbs up' as a visual aid. He motioned Keiko over and whispered a few words, getting a nod in return.

"Let's go." Yusuke said and waited for his friend.

Grabbing his wallet, Kurama placed a bill on the counter to which Keiko immediately walked over and grabbing the money, said.

"Oh…no you don't, you paid more than enough for the trip and besides you're a friend…here." She held the money out for him to take.

"That was a wedding gift and I only contributed to the fund." Kurama said, holding a hand up in refusal.

"I know you contributed more than anyone else…you practically paid for all that and then some." Keiko said, motioning to a stack of about 20 boxes that lined the wall between the kitchen door and an unmarked door. The largest box was about the size of a washing machine, the smallest a shoe box. They had bought so much stuff in Hawaii that they sent it back by mail and was still waiting on a few boxes that had yet to arrive.

"Do you let Kuwabara eat for free?" Kurama asked.

"Yes so you…." Yusuke cut Keiko off.

"The horse eats about three times more than you…and that's on a good day." Yusuke said, rolling his eyes.

"Yusuke…" Keiko said, slapping him lightly on the arm. "That's not the point."

"Consider me paying for two-thirds of his then." Kurama said, turning to put an end to the discussion.

"Wait…this is to much, let me get your change." Keiko called out and went over to the register to get change.

"Consider it a tip." Kurama said, still heading to where Yusuke had moved to the unmarked door.

"For a simple cup of tea." Keiko yelled, walking over to try and give back the change.

"It was excellent service." Kurama said, this time managing a smile that reached his eyes.

"Let it go Keiko, you can't outwit the fox…besides if he wants to pay, let him…unlike Kuwabara who didn't even think twice." Yusuke muttered the last part and pushed the door to head up the stairs.

"We'll see about that." Keiko said, placing the change in her apron and going back to helping customers.

Kurama shook his head and followed the raven haired up the stairs. At first he thought they were going to the apartment, but Yusuke passed that door and went to another flight of stairs. When the door opened, it led to the roof.

"Is this private enough?" Yusuke asked, opening his arms, showing off the view.

The red head smiled again and walked over to look out at the city.

"So talk…what's up…haven't seen you since the wedding." Yusuke said, also making his way over.

"I took your advice." Kurama all but whispered.

"What?" Yusuke wasn't sure he'd heard correctly.

"Hiei asked to spend time with Youko." Kurama said, not turning around.

"Oooookay…and that's a bad thing?" Yusuke asked confused, wondering what made Hiei ask after he had first suggested it to the red head.

"It is not that easy." Kurama sighed.

"What…Hiei realizes now that you're Youko and are one in the same…right?" Yusuke said.

"Yusuke." Kurama sighed, turning to the raven haired, he said. "I am not really Youko."

"Wahoooo." Yusuke threw his hands up again in complete disbelief. "Back up and explain that to me. I mean you were Youko, the famous thief and you came here after almost dying and created this body to live. So what if you have a different body or your voice changes, though I don't understand your attitude at times…." He rambled.

"Yusuke." Kurama waited until the boy quieted before continuing. "Have you heard of a condition called 'multiple personality'?"

"Yeah…I think so." He answered, placing his hands on his hips in thought. "But only what I've seen on TV or in the movies…why?" He asked, looking at the red head.

"That is what you can say I have." Kurama answered, turning back to look out over the city.

"You've still got some explaining to do." Yusuke said, scratching the back of his head.

"When Youko chose this body, he was almost dead, too weak to do anything, including either killing or taking over the soul of the life that became Shuiichi Minamino." Kurama started to explain.

When Yusuke didn't say anything, he continued.

"When Youko was strong enough and 'awakened', Shuiichi was still a child and didn't know what to think or do. With Youko's personality as it is and Shuiichi being an innocent ningen, I was 'created'…to be a referee of sorts, to balance the two…I became Kurama."

He turned to see the look on the raven haired's face and to see if he understood what was just said.

"So you're saying you're three different people." Yusuke said, now so confused he was actually getting a headache.

"Yes." The red head said with a nod.

"So with Hiei being with Youko…wait are you saying you don't know what's happening?" Yusuke asked.

Kurama shook his head, saying. "The three of us know what is going on most of the time. You can think of my mind as two separate rooms, one for each of them and me in the hallway. Most of the time, I flow freely between the rooms, though Youko and Shuiichi's rooms can be closed as needed. Youko almost always keeps his door closed, unless he is summoned, forces his way out, or appears without his control. Where as Shuiichi's room only closes when I fight, Youko comes out, or if the situation becomes to stressful. My space is always open, there is no door to my space. Youko very rarely goes to Shuiichi's room and vice versa. It is me that comforts the ningen when needed and keeps the line of communications open. Now that Youko has been allowed out on a schedule, I am with Shuiichi, who can not handle the situation yet, so the door is closed. When I am behind a closed door, on either side, I have no idea what goes on in the other's room, thus I have no idea what happens between Youko and Hiei." The red head stopped and took a deep breath. He'd never explained this to anyone and wondered why he'd spilled his guts now. As he looked back out over the city, it reminded him of the first time he talked to Yusuke on the roof of the hospital. Maybe that was why he felt comfortable opening up now.

Yusuke was studying the ground, kicking around the loose gravel with the tip of his shoe, trying to process the information.

"Does Hiei know all this?" He finally asked, looking up.

"Of course not, though I do think he understands, in a way." Kurama answered with a shrugged.

"Do you plan on telling him?" Yusuke wanted to know.

"I do not know yet." Kurama sighed again.

"So what is the schedule?" Yusuke asked.

"What?" The red head turned, actually taken off guard with the question.

"How often is Youko coming out?" Yusuke asked.

"He will come out on the night of the full moon." Kurama answered.

Yusuke looked up to the sky in thought for a moment. "So they were together last night?'

"Yes, but they were also together the night of your wedding. That was when I realized I needed to comfort Shuiichi and Youko locked me out." The red head informed.

"Why did he do that?" Yusuke wondered.

"It is his way of 'throwing it in my face', you could say. I can not give Hiei what he wants when it comes to 'pleasures', I am to ningen for him like this. I did however want to stay and stop Youko if a problem arose. However, Shuiichi could not handle it and Youko had no problem in locking me out." Kurama turned back to the view of the street before continuing. "Also Hiei made Youko agree not to cause problems in exchange for being allowed to quote 'come out and play' and with that, I have not had any communication with him since the first night."

Yusuke winced at the words, 'come out and play.' "Are you alright…physically I mean?" He wondered how that worked. Youko had his own body but.

Still looking out at the city, Kurama said. "I am sore. I know they are going rough, I can feel it in a way. Staying until Shuiichi is calm takes a lot out of me as well…so…" He let it drop.

"What was Hiei like after…?" Yusuke didn't want to say it.

"Content, happy…satisfied." Kurama said, reaching down to pick up a pebble and rolling it between his fingers.

"How long are you going to let this go on then?" Yusuke asked.

The red head shrugged. "I made a deal, until Hiei or Youko changes their minds I guess."

The door opened to the roof and a young girl poked her head out. "Mr. Urameshi, Ms. Keiko needs you."

"Be there in a minute." He waved and the girl gave a nod before closing the door.

"I'll be here if you want to talk." Yusuke offered, reaching over to place a hand on the red head's shoulder and giving it a squeeze.

"Thank you."

_**(end flashback) **_

Yusuke got up and stretched, not knowing how long he'd sat thinking. He needed to get to bed, but could not help but wonder if Kurama was going to be okay.

End Chapter 3

Lyrics to the song:_**Only Time**_ – by: _Enya_

Who can say where the road goes…Where the day flows - only time

And who can say if your love grows…As your heart chose - only time

Who can say why your heart sighs…As your love flies - only time

Who can say when the roads meet…That love might be in your heart…And who can say…when the day sleeps…If the night keeps all your heart

Night keep all your heart

Who can if your love grows…As your heart chose - only time

And who can say where the road goes…Where the day goes, where day flows - only time

Who knows-only time


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

By the time Kurama got back to his car and fought traffic, the sun had sat. Keying into his apartment, he met darkness. Thinking he had beat Hiei home and in a way glad, he was quite surprised to see the fire demon sitting on the couch when he turned on the overhead light.

"Oh you are here." He said, placing his briefcase by the door and walking over to the couch. "You must be hungry then, I will start dinner." He had already taken his suit jacket and tie off when he went back to get his car. Placing them on the back of the couch, he proceeded to fix his rolled sleeves, while walking towards the kitchen.

Hiei followed the red head to the kitchen and watched as he took out various pots and bowls before digging in the refrigerator.

"You're late." He said.

"Sorry." Kurama said, not stopping what he was doing as he continued to open packages and mix them in the pots.

"Rough day?" He asked, staying closer to the doorway, out of the way, as he could see the fox had a plan for dinner and seemed to have everything under control.

"Yes, you could say that, but I have a three day weekend now." The red head said, stirring the contents before finally looking to the smaller demon. Even though he had left work after lunch, he had managed to get enough work done, so he could take Friday off, if he wanted. There was no need to tell Hiei that he took a half day or that he went and saw Yusuke.

"Sounds good, want to make some plans?" Hiei asked, staying in the doorway.

"What do you have in mind?" The red head asked back, taking a hot pot off the stove and dividing it up into two bowls, then doing the same with the other pot.

Taking the bowls and placing them on the table, Kurama turned to get them drinks, but ended up walking right into Hiei's opened arms. "We could just stay inside all weekend." The black haired said, lightly placing kisses on the red head's neck, where his shirt was unbuttoned.

Pulling away and continuing to the fridge, Kurama remarked with a soft laugh. "Though it sounds interesting, I do believe we will need food and I do have a few other errands to run."

Hiei thought he heard nervousness in the laugh, but shrugged. "It was only a suggestion." He said, taking a seat.

"Well, we will see." Kurama said half heartily before placing two glasses down and taking the other seat. The two began eating and after a few bites, he said. "We could go sparing tomorrow."

"That's sounds good." Hiei said, after swallowing. "Now that I think about it, I should spar with Youko sometime." He suggested, picking up his glass to take a drink.

Kurama's head was down, so he didn't see the red head flinch. He did however see the hesitation with the fork.

"What?" Hiei wondered, placing the glass down. "Even though we haven't had a good fight in awhile doesn't mean you should let Youko's skills deteriorate." When Kurama didn't look back up, or even acknowledge that he had heard. He added. "I'm sure as vain as Youko is…he would say he didn't need to train."

Kurama put his fork down then looked back up as he replied. "That will be fine, if that is what you wish."

Knowing now that the fox wasn't paying attention and seeing a blank look in those green eyes, Hiei asked. "Are you alright?"

"Yes." Kurama said with a quick nod. "Like you said, it was a rough day." He added then got up and took is bowl to the sink. Getting into one of the cabinets, he got a container and put the remaining food in it.

"You didn't eat much." Hiei said, walking over to put his empty bowl in the sink.

"I had a late lunch." Kurama lied. He had worked through lunch and then took his walk. He'd only had the tea at Yusuke's, but he still wasn't hungry.

Waiting until Kurama put the food away and was back at the sink to do the dishes. Hiei again wrapped his arms around the slim waist, from behind. "Well, if you want, I can make it better." He said, running his hands up the chest and again nipping, this time on the shirt.

Kurama tried not to tense and closed his eyes as the fire demon continued his torture.

Realizing he was not going to be able to persuade the smaller demon otherwise, the red head turned around and kissed the covering over the jagan eye. "Shall we?" He said.

Hiei smiled and grabbing his hand, led him out of the kitchen towards the living room. Taking off his clothes, Hiei was naked and had started in on the red head's clothes by the time they'd reach the couch.

"Let me get the light." Kurama managed to say between his shirt being pulled off and the kisses to his lips and neck.

"Forget it." Hiei said, tossing the shirt and attacking those pale lips again. He couldn't understand why the red head wanted the light off. Over the past several months they had only made love in the dark and had no mental connection either, as they had in the beginning. He would admit he'd been finding the images erotic in a way.

"It will…only…take…second…" Kurama managed to get out as his lips were attacked and he was pushed on the couch where his neck and nipples started being tortured.

"Don't worry about it." Hiei actually growled. He didn't mean too, he was just frustrated at the way the stubborn fox was acting. Seeing a scared look in the green eyes, he didn't say sorry, only apologized by kissing the red head's lips softly.

Moving to get the fox's pants off, Kurama managed to roll over as the pants met the floor. "Please take me from behind." He tried to say with passion. Inside his mind though, he was pounding on Youko's door, wanting the spirit yoko to come out and at the same time, Shuiichi's door was closing, leaving him alone.

"As you wish." Hiei growled again as the pale behind was presented to him, not paying attention to the slight fear in the voice.

Realizing he needed lubricant, Hiei reached over and opened the trunk, which served as a coffee table. Grabbing a tube that they had stashed awhile ago, from their previous romps, he placed a large amount on his fingers and then began to prepare the gorgeous creature under him.

When he felt the fox was ready, he pulled the red head off the couch and pushed him over the trunk where he sheathed himself quickly, before pausing and waiting.

Kurama gasped, this had become the fire demon's favorite place and position to take him. The gasp was followed by a sharp hiss, followed by a moan as he felt his body relax to the intrusion.

Taking that as his cue, Hiei proceeded to pound the red head. His climax building as he took the fox from behind, most of the time he was on his back, the red head riding him, but he'd always preferred this position. Now that he was the one taking control this time, he wanted his way. Grunts and groans, from both, started to fill the room.

Reaching around and grabbing Kurama's cock, he realized the red head was not that hard. Well, he would have to fix that now, wouldn't he? Pumping the member with his hand, he felt it get harder as he squeezed and stroked.

When he felt his cock taken, Kurama's mind went wild and he began to gasp. He could not deny the feelings and sensations his body was going through. Hating himself for not having control, his climax peaked as he felt his spot being hit. Jerking and spilling his seed on the trunk and Hiei's hand, his eyes watered and went out of focus as he bit his lip.

That was all it took, when he felt the fox jerk and the heat of his seed, Hiei let out a grunt and climaxed.

Pausing for a moment to let them both reclaim their breathing and to let their bodies settle. Hiei then closed his eyes and leaned over, placing soft kisses on the sweaty back.

Inside Kurama was having a panic attack. His mind was in chaos, he had no control since he could not turn to Youko for encouragement. Wielding his body to relax and regaining his focus, he waited till Hiei pulled out, trying not to wince.

Sitting back on couch and preparing to cuddle the red head, Hiei was surprised when Kurama leaned over, grabbed his shirt and wiped the trunk with it before moving to the other end of the couch.

"You okay?" He asked.

"Hum…yes…shall we take a shower?" Kurama suggested between trying to control his breath, he then went to stand, but caught himself as the room spun. Hiei jumped up with worry as he saw the red head wobble, but the red head held up a hand, motioning he needed no help and headed to the stairs. Hiei hit the light before following.

End Chapter 4

Lyrics to the song: _**Somewhere I Belong**_ - by: _Linkin Park_

(When this began) I had nothing to say and I get lost in the nothingness inside of me

(I was confused) And I let it all out to find, that I'm the only person with these things in mind (Inside of me) But all that they can see the words revealed, is the only real thing that I've got left to feel (Nothing to lose) Just stuck, hollow and alone and the fault is my own, and the fault is my own

(Course)

I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real…I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long (Erase all the pain till it's gone) I wanna heal I wanna feel like I'm close to something real…I wanna find something I've wanted all along

Somewhere I belong

And I've got nothing to say I can't believe I didn't fall right down on my face

(I was confused) Looking everywhere only to find that it's not the way I had imagined it all in my mind (So what am I) What do I have but negativity….Cause I can't justify the way, everyone is looking at me (Nothing to lose) Nothing to gain, hollow and alone and the fault is my own and the fault is my own.

I will never know myself until I do this on my own…And I will never feel anything else until my wounds are healed…I will never be anything till I break away from me, I will break away…I'll find myself today

I wanna heal I wanna feel like I'm somewhere I belong…I wanna heal I wanna feel like I'm somewhere I belong…Somewhere I belong.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Hiei's eyes squinted as the sun peeked through the corners of the curtains, a ray at just the right angle to catch him in the face as he slept. Subconsciously, he reached out with one hand to the feel the other side of the bed, it was as he expected it to be, empty.

Rolling over, he opened his eyes and stared at the empty place in the bed where his lover should be. He guessed he should be use to it by now. It has been this way for the last six months or so. He mostly wanted to know 'why.' Why the fox always left before he got up and why it was only after they'd had sex the night before, it didn't matter if it was with the red head or silver haired, the bed would be empty. It hadn't even dawned on him until after the third or so time he was with Youko that he'd noticed the bed and house were empty, but again, only on the mornings after sex. He no longer considered it a coincidence. Oh, he'd tried to ask the red head, but got the same old answers, 'I had to get to work early.' Or 'Sorry, I forgot I had an errand to run.' Sometimes he came back with bags and sometimes not.

Getting up and going to the bathroom, he mentally scanned the house and immediate area. He didn't know why he still tried. The answer was always the same, 'no fox present' in the house or nearby.

Showering and making his way downstairs, he walked into the kitchen to see the dishes from the night before drying in the rack. Looking over at the table, he saw a box of cereal and a bowl, with spoon. He smirked, it still got to him that Kurama felt he needed to wait on him when it came to ningen food. He had tried to tell the red head he knew more than he thought when it came to the different food. What did Kurama think he would do, pour the milk in the box, or maybe use a plate? He had eaten his fair share of cereal since living here and knew what to do.

Seeing a folded piece of paper in the bowl, he opened it, shaking his head as he read.

_Hiei……_

'_There should be enough milk in the fridge. I will get more today at the store after we spar. Please let me know if there is anything else you would like me to get, think about dinner. I had a few things to take care of and will meet you at the usual spot at 10 am.'_

_Kurama_

Looking at the clock on the wall, red eyes noted it was a little after 9. Just enough time to eat and get to the temple for a warm up session.

_**(In the forest on the temple grounds…same morning)**_

The sun rose over the horizon as a lean figure moved with the grace of a dancer. The red head moved in slow and precise movements in a routine, never once faulting or making a mistake, for he had been doing this for many years. The sun played shadow games through the trees, highlighting the moves, as a stage light would a performer.

He was glad he'd gotten back into Tai Chi. Many people think it's for old people and many think it's a form of some martial art, but it wasn't either. It was a series of moves made to calm, relax and clear the mind. A form of exercise you might say, but for the mind as well as the body. He had learned a style called the '18 Step Taiji Qigong Form.' And yes there are many different techniques depending on the region where it was created.

Moving into step 9 called 'pushing with palms', Kurama's mind was nowhere near cleared, as it should be by this stage, nor was his body as numb and relaxed. But that didn't stop him from continuing to the end.

With his body knowing what to do, his mind replayed the previous evening. After Hiei had taken him, they went and took a shower, together of course. Hiei could not seem to keep his hands off of him and had taken him again in the shower. The red head was glad the water hid the tears he could not stop from falling as he was taken once again from behind. Hiei's demon instincts were showing more and more after they had sex; it was even worse after being with Youko.

Sex in the Makai was a form of power, not so much pleasure. With Hiei being seme in the relationship with him, it was only natural, the feeling of possessiveness and desire got stronger, each 'claiming' to show and make a point about who was in charge of the situation. It was only fair in his relationship with the fire demon. Youko was obviously seme with Hiei, so Hiei needed to be seme to him. He could not see the fire demon being uke to two people, his pride to strong for that. Maybe the possessiveness was what was making him feel like he needed to leave in the morning, not wanting the possibility of being taken again so soon, knowing he could still come and go as he pleased, trying to show that he was not some play thing. On the mornings after not having sex, Kurama had tried to snuggle and pamper the fire demon, trying to make up for him leaving on the other mornings, but Hiei didn't seem to want that, so he'd stopped. What was the saying…'he couldn't win for losing.'

Making it to the last step, 'lowering the breath' he took a deep breath before he wielded all the air out of his lungs while pushing his hands down and clearing his mind of, 'the old, the bad, the negative, the false, the dark, the doubts.' Taking another big breath, he raised his arms high in the air and brought in, 'the new, the good, the true, the light, the possibilities.' Breathing out as slow as he could with his eyes closed, Kurama sat cross-legged on the ground. Placing a hand on each knee, his mind knocked on Youko's door, telling him the fire demon was requesting his presence.

Hiei sensed the red head, but by the time he got to the exact spot, there was a silver fox, sitting in the clearing.

Moving to stand in front of the fox, whose eyes were closed, he waited. He was about to say something when he was pounced on and pinned to the ground.

"Well, well…look what I have caught. I see you could not wait for the next full moon…and what an interesting place for me to take you, natural foliage is so much better than dealing with seeds." Youko purred as he started kissing the smaller demon's neck.

"Get off me." Hiei growled, but couldn't help a moan as he was nibbled on the neck.

"Are you sure?" Youko smirked as his hand moved to the fire demon's crotch. "Your pants say something different."

"I want to spar with you." Hiei growled again, pushing the larger figure off him.

Youko rolled off and sat, pouting. "Sparring, I do not need practice." Seeing the look on the fire demon's face he added. "Unless we are in danger, or are we needed for a mission."

"Neither." Hiei said and couldn't control a smirked as he got up, thinking about the remark that was made yesterday at dinner, but then he thought about the last part, thinking 'He should know we aren't in danger?' He mentally shrugged.

"Well then, why bother?" Youko huffed and got up to stand, towering over the smaller figure. "I could think of other ways to exercise, if that is what you want to do." A small thin smile played across is lips in hopes that the fire demon understood what he was referring to.

"Let's start." Hiei huffed, but added. "Who knows what might happen after I kick your ass." He mused and drew his sword. He'd not worn his cloak, only his tank top, pants, and boots.

"Oh…I see." The spirit yoko cooed and golden eyes held mischief as a hand moved to pull a rose out of silver hair.

a)a)a)a

A few hours later, two figures lay in the shadows of a large tree, both were exhausted. Neither one was touching the other as they lightly napped, regaining their strength.

Hiei cracked an eye and noted the time by the placement of the sun. It was early afternoon and his body knew it was time for lunch for his stomach was growling.

He heard a chuckle beside him. "Hungry are we." Youko said, rolling on his side to look at him.

"Yeah…maybe we can eat at the temple. I wouldn't mind seeing Yukina anyways." Hiei said, getting up to grab his clothes and putting them on.

Youko sighed and also got up, putting his pants on before finding his white tunic and noticing it was ripped.

Hiei smirked when he saw the ripped tunic and the look on the yoko's face.

"Paybacks a pain ain't it." He said, sheathing his sword.

Youko didn't say anything as he tossed the tunic in the woods.

Hiei started walking towards the temple, but paused as he realized he was not being followed. Turning, he saw Youko hadn't moved.

"What." He asked.

"I believe it would be better if Kurama came back. I do not think I would be welcomed at the temple." Youko said softly.

Hiei rolled his eyes. "Whatever." He grumbled, not understanding why he wouldn't be welcomed. He was still Kurama, just in his fox form. Shaking his head, he turned and continued his walk.

a)a)a)a

"Thank you so much for the food Yusuke." Yukina said as she walked the raven haired out.

"No big." Yusuke replied. "We have more than enough made at any given time and besides, you shouldn't have to do all the cooking for the old hag."

Yukina placed her hands in front of her, closed her eyes and smiled at the boy's 'term of endearment.'

"Just don't let Kuwabara eat all of it." He added.

Yukina giggled. "I won't"

They made it to the front porch and noticed the figure coming up the steps.

"Hiei…so good to see you…is Kurama with you?" Yukina asked as the fire demon made it to the top of the stairs.

"Yes…he should be coming any minute." Hiei said as he nodded to Yusuke in greeting.

"Been sparring?" Yusuke asked as he took in the disheveled look of the fire demon.

"Yes…Yukina…do you mind if I clean up and get a bite to eat?" Hiei asked.

"Of course, by all means, you know you are always welcomed here and Yusuke has been kind enough to bring more than enough food." She said with a smile, gesturing with her hand to the door.

Hiei walked by them and went to slide back the door when Kuwabara came through, almost running over him.

"Hey…watch it shrimp." The orange haired yelled.

"Out of my way, you oaf." Hiei growled, pushing by and disappearing into temple.

"Urameshi, I was thinking…wooooo whose spirit energy is that, it feels familiar…yet it's weak." Kuwabara said, stepping back as he felt the aura hit him.

Yusuke turned to see Kurama slowly walking to the steps. He knew his tall friend had the ability to sense things and was never wrong in his feelings.

The red head staggered, but corrected himself as he made it to the first step. After making it half way though, he started to fall forward. Before he could hit the step, he was caught by the arms of the raven haired.

Yusuke saw the struggle Kurama was having in getting up the stairs and was getting ready to offer help when he saw the red head go down, moving fast, maybe not as fast as Hiei, but fast enough, he caught the lean figure before he hit the step.

"Hey you okay?" Yusuke asked as he steadied the red head.

"Yes, thank you." Kurama quickly said. "Hiei and I were sparring pretty hard and I did not eat breakfast this morning. I just need to regain my energy and eat." He answered and pushed off the former detective to continue up the steps, however he only made it a few before he fell forward again.

Yusuke picked up the red head in a bridle style and started climbing the stairs. He was worried for his friend and wondered just what kind of sparring the two had been doing.

He looked down to see the big green eyes closed, hoping the fox had not passed out, he joked. "Geez Kurama, have you lost weight?"

He felt the body jerk before a firm hand pushed on his chest.

"Put me down…now." He heard, the last word pronounced firmly.

"In a minute, we are almost to the top." Yusuke said. He'd been walking slow and taking his time, not wanting to bounce the fox to much.

"Now…please." This time the last word was said with a plea.

"Okay." Yusuke complied and put the red head down, but didn't let go until he knew the man could stand.

"Thank you." Kurama muttered, pushing off and continuing up the stairs, when he made it to the top he saw the look on Yukina's face.

"I am fine, just tired and hungry." He tried to assure her. She only nodded in understanding, knowing Kurama well enough by now to know not to push the issue.

"Hey, you want me to get the shrimp?" Kuwabara asked motioning with his thumb to indicate that the 'shrimp' was already in the temple.

"No…that is not necessary." Was all Kurama said.

Kuwabara was going to say something else, but was cut off by Yusuke.

"Hey, give me a minute with fox boy will yeah…thanks." The raven haired didn't wait for an answer as he grabbed the taller boy and shoved him back into the temple. He held the door for Yukina and as she walked through, he said. "You better get Hiei fed before blockhead gets to it." He smiled as he closed the door behind her.

"Time to talk." Yusuke said, turning back to Kurama.

"What are you talking about Yusuke? I told you I was fine and that is the end of discussion." Kurama let his voice get deep, trying to make his point.

"I just had to carry you up a flight of stairs, you passed out and Kuwabara says your spirit energy is low and weak." Yusuke said back with his own power of voice.

"I assure you I am fine and this is the end of discussion, do I make myself clear." Kurama's voice, now tinged with Youko's, stated.

Yusuke watched as the green eyes turned gold and was going to tell the yoko to butt out, but was cut off.

"I suggest you let it drop, you are no longer a detective, so stay out of business that does not concern you." The mixed voice said.

Flustered, Yusuke just walked off.

Green eyes returned and Kurama stood there confused and upset. 'Why did Youko want to run Yusuke off?'

End Chapter 5

Lyrics to the song:_**Nobody's Listening**_ – by: _Linkin Park_

Peep the style and the kids checking for it…The number one question is 'How could you ignore it?' We drop right back in the cut…Over basement tracks…With raps that got you backing this up like (rewind that) We're just rolling with the rhythm…Rise from the ashes of stylistic division with these non-stop lyrics of life living…Not to be forgotten, but still unforgiven…But in the meantime there are those who wanna talk this and that so I suppose…It gets to a point feelings gotta get hurt and get dirty with the people spreading the dirt (it goes)

(Course)

Try to give you warning, but everyone ignores me (told you everything loud and clear)

But nobody's listening…Call to you so clearly, but you don't want to hear me

(told you everything loud and clear)…But nobody's listening

I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress, handful of anger, held in my chest…And everything left is a waste of time…I hate my rhymes (but hate everyone else's more)

I'm riding on the back of this pressure guessing that it's better…I can't keep myself together because of all this stress…Gave me something to write on the pain gave me something…I could set my sights on you never forget the blood sweat and tears

The Uphill struggle over years the fear and trash talking and the people it was to

And the people that started it just like you

I got a heart full of pain, head full of stress, handful of anger, held in my chest …Up hill struggle, blood, sweat and tears nothing to gain, everything to fear

(Coming at you from every side)


	6. Chapter 6 part 1

Chapter 6 (part 1)

Kurama sat through lunch with Kuwabara and Genkai's eyes watching him the whole time. Genkai would take a sip of tea and study him, while Kuwabara kept giving him weird glances. He expected Kuwabara to say something, but what he didn't realize was, the taller boy had learned after his incident with Yusuke and Keiko's pregnancy to keep his mouth shut about things he wasn't privy to and this was one of them.

When he felt the master staring at him again, the red head stared right back.

"Kurama, I was wondering if you would come over tomorrow and help me give Puu his bath. He seems to handle it better with you helping." Genkai said, taking a sip of tea.

"Of course." Kurama said, placing his own cup down. He then looked to Hiei. "That is unless you have plans."

"No, I don't." Hiei replied.

"I don't see why Kurama has to help with Urameshi's bird. Make that lazy bum come and help you." Kuwabara said, grabbing more food to put on his plate.

"It's okay Kuwabara, I enjoy spending time with Puu…he is a…very interesting creature." Kurama said.

"Well he should be, he's half of Urameshi or something like that." The orange haired said, continuing to eat.

Finishing what little was on his plate, Kurama stood and bowed. "If you will excuse me I need to get to the store. Thank you for the meal and I will see you tomorrow." He turned and acknowledged Yukina and then Genkai.

"You hardly ate anything. Do you wish to take some with you?" Yukina asked as she had seen what little food the red head had actually ate.

"No thank you…I am planning something special for dinner so….." Kurama told her and turned to Hiei. "Did you think of anything else besides milk that we need?" He asked him.

"No." Hiei answered. "Since you seem to have something planned I can't think of anything." He finished off his drink and went to stand. "I'll go with you though."

"There is no need. I know how you get shopping. Stay and visit and I will see you at home." Kurama said and again bowed.

Three of the four watched with worry as the red head made his exit, the forth just shrugged and walked the other way to the garden area.

"Something's wrong with him, isn't there?" Yukina whispered, looking to Genkai.

"You sense it too." She said.

"Hey, I wanted to say something, but you know how Kurama is, I don't want to get him mad at me and since you all feel it too…" Kuwabara said.

"What is it?" Genkai asked, giving him her full attention.

"Well, I…." Kuwabara got nervous and started to fidget.

"Just tell me, I'll take responsibility." She snapped.

Taking her word, he started rambling. "I sensed Youko earlier and then when Kurama came to the temple he's youki was weak. I almost didn't recognize it. He collapsed on the stairs and Urameshi had to carry him. He said that he and Hiei had been sparring pretty rough and that he was just tired and hadn't eaten."

"I thought as much." Genkai said and took a sip. "I'll try to talk to him tomorrow."

"You didn't hear it from me." Kuwabara muttered as he reached for more food.

a)a)a)a

Kurama managed to get the food put away before collapsing on the couch. He was feeling really tired, but knew he should get up and take a shower, for he was hot, sweaty and smelled. No wonder the others were staring at him, even the guy behind the register at the store was looking at him funny.

Getting his second wind, he made it upstairs and got undressed. He was sore and stiff and hoped a hot shower would relieve his aches.

Reaching in and turning on the shower to max, to get the hot water to move faster, he then reached over and turned on the light. What he saw in the mirror made him gasp.

His body was purple, black and blue. It started along his neck where his shirt collar would be and moved across his chest down to his lower region. His face was pale and his hair was dull.

Turning, he looked at his backside, letting out another gasp. He was bruised all along his lower region. Dried bloody claw marks spotted his lower back and he had dried blood on his butt cheeks and thighs.

Starting to shake from panic, he heard a voice in his head. "_I am sorry, you can rest now. I am fine…thank you."_

Green eyes rolled and then the figure sighed as he got in the shower. Thinking over what must have happened during the sparring and realizing Youko and Hiei had had sex was not a secret per say. When he saw Hiei and felt the soreness in his body he realized that. Now what really shocked him after seeing the blood on his lower back and thighs, was that, Hiei had apparently taken the fox. Youko must really like the fire demon, to give him that honor. He only knew of one other person, or demon that is, to have had that honor and that was Kuronue.

End Chapter 6 (part 1)


	7. Chapter 6 part2

Chapter 6 (part 2)

It was late in the evening by the time Hiei came home. He walked in to see Kurama asleep on the couch.

Walking over and studying the red head, who was not wearing a shirt, he couldn't help but notice the pale, flawless skin. After all the battles Kurama has been through, he was always able to heal the wounds, no matter how bad the injuries. He knew he had been a little harsh during their sparring and may have caused bruising, along with a few cuts, but there wasn't even a faded bruise to show that anything had happened. The red head had one arm above his head and his head was turned into the arm, covering a side of his face, making him look so…innocent. Kurama's body may be that of a twenty something ningen and his mind of a thousand plus spirit kitsune, but he still managed to look like an innocent child.

Kurama jerked, moving his head and opening his eyes, they landed on the fire demon.

"Hey." He said, yawning.

"Hey yourself, sorry to wake you." Hiei said, sitting on the couch next to the red head's waist.

Kurama shifted to his side to make room for him to sit. "It is okay, I did not even know I had fallen asleep." He said with an apologetic smile at the demon and added. "I guess you wore me out earlier."

"You could say that." Hiei smirked.

Noting the time, Kurama asked. "Are you hungry?"

"Yeah…I am…I'm looking forward to the special meal you have planned." Hiei said, taking off his cloak.

Red eyes noticed the look on the red head's face. "If you don't want to make it tonight, that's okay. I didn't plan on being gone so long, but I ended up helping Yukina in the garden." Hiei said.

Kurama moved around Hiei to get up and heading to the kitchen, said. "No that is fine." Giving a soft laugh. "I should have started it earlier and here I was asleep. If you do not mind eating late, I will start on it right now."

Hiei followed the red head to the kitchen and watched as he pulled various things out of the fridge. He then watched as Kurama opened each package and then seemed to be confused as to what was in them.

Thinking the fox was just tired and wasn't thinking straight, he walked over and started putting things away.

"What are you doing?" Kurama asked as the items were rewrapped and put back.

"It's late, you're tired and this will take to long. Let's just make something simple." Hiei answered and as he put the last of the items up, began pulling out bread and meats.

"Are you sure, it will not take that long." Kurama said, feeling like an idiot for not remembering the meal and starting it earlier.

"Tomorrow." Hiei said, handing him a sandwich.

They ate in silence. When Hiei was done, he said. "I'm going to go take a shower, care to join me."

"No, thank you, I will clean up down here and be up in a few." Kurama said, grabbing their empty plates and going to the sink.

Hiei wrapped his arms around Kurama's slim waist and kissed the still bare skin along the shoulder and spine.

"Don't take to long." He whispered.

"I won't." He heard back.

When he was sure Hiei was upstairs and heard the water, Kurama sat at the kitchen table and closed his eyes.

In his mind he knocked on Shuiichi's door, not getting an answer, he became flustered and tried again, still no answer. 'What the hell is with him?' Kurama thought as he went back to cleaning the dishes.

a)a)a)a

The next morning Hiei rolled over and was surprised to see red hair in his face. Turning and noting the time, 5 am and the sun not yet up. He snuggled against the lean body's back and buried his face into the red hair, falling right back to sleep.

When he woke again, the bed was empty. 'Figures.' He thought and got up scanning the area as always. His eyes though, went wide as he sensed the red head downstairs. 'Well at least he's still in the house.' He thought as he went to take a quick shower.

Making it downstairs, he saw the red head digging around in the trunk.

"Taking inventory?" He joked as he slipped a blue tank top over his head.

Closing the trunk, Kurama turned and looked at him with a look of someone who had gotten caught with their hand in the cookie jar.

"Uh, yes, just a habit." Kurama voice cracked as he turned back around and picked up the remote to turn on the TV.

Hiei went into the kitchen and rummaged around, but couldn't find anything he wanted to eat.

Heading back into the living room, he ran into Kurama in the doorway.

"Would you like to go to Yusuke's and eat?" He asked the red head.

"Sure, it has been awhile since you were there." Kurama said, turning and grabbing his keys as he headed to the door.

a)a)a)a

When they got to Yusuke's it was quiet. Saturday morning at the restaurant was never that busy.

Finding a corner booth, a young girl came over and took their orders. As she left to go fill them, Kurama saw Yusuke come out of the kitchen. The raven haired looked their way and gave a heads up in acknowledgement, but then turned and went back into the kitchen.

When their food arrived, they made small talk.

"So what do you want to do today?" Kurama asked, grabbing the ketchup and putting some on his hash browns.

"Before or after you help give Yusuke's bird his bath." Hiei said.

"Oh…um after that I guess." Kurama said and had to think back to when he'd said he would help Genkai.

During their meal, Hiei's communicator went off.

"It's Mukuro, I need to take this." Hiei said, standing. "Don't wait on me, I'll see you later." He then headed outside, no doubt going to the roof to have privacy.

Finishing, Kurama called the girl over and asked for his check.

"I'm sorry sir, but Ms. Keiko told me not to write it down, so I don't have a check to give you." The girl said.

"I see, thank you." Kurama muttered, understanding. He then went to stand and reached for his wallet.

"If there is a problem, you need to go….." The girl stammered, getting nervous.

"I will take care of it." Kurama said and handed the girl a bill. "You still deserve a tip, thank you for the service." He gave a big smile, to which she just about turned to liquid goo on him.

Leaving the girl standing in awe, Kurama caught Yusuke coming out of the kitchen again.

"Hello Yusuke, can I pay you for Hiei's and mine's meal?" He asked.

"Fine, whatever." Yusuke muttered and went over to the register.

"How much do I owe you?" Kurama asked, reaching back into his wallet.

"Whatever." Yusuke said again.

"Is something wrong?" Kurama asked when he noticed that the raven haired was tense and seemed to want to run.

Yusuke looked around before coming over and standing right in front of him.

"You could say I don't appreciate you letting Youko tell me to butt out." The raven haired hissed in his face.

"What…what are you…talking about?" Kurama stammered. His eyes going wide as he stepped back in complete confusion.

"Yesterday." Yusuke said, placing his hand on his hips and glaring.

"I am sorry Yusuke. If Youko did something, I apologize for him." The red head said softly with hurt in his eyes. He placed a bill on the counter and turned to leave.

Taking a deep breath and running a hand though his hair, Yusuke said. "Stop, wait a minute will yeah."

Turning around, Kurama just stood there. Yusuke walked over and grabbed his wrist, dragging him to the unmarked door. When he saw the girl looking at them, Yusuke held a hand up, indicating he'd be back in five.

Pushing Kurama through the door, Yusuke turned on him. "What happened yesterday at the temple?"

"What do you mean?" Kurama said, back against the wall and a little frightened at the tone in the detective's voice.

"You don't remember…then who the hell was it I was carrying up the stairs?" Yusuke tried to keep his voice calm, but was failing.

Seeing that Kurama was looking even more confused, he took a deep breath again and said softly. "Tell me what you remember about yesterday."

"I was in the forest doing a warm up and then Hiei showed up to spar with Youko, Youko told me to head to the temple after they were done." Kurama told him, his green eyes concentrating. He looked to Yusuke and his eyes widened as he seem to remember. "I was tired and I remember making it to the stairs, but then the next thing I remember was getting in the shower at home." The red head looked like he was about to cry.

"You passed out on the stairs." Yusuke said. "I thought you had…so it must have been Shuiichi that came out and covered for you."

"But, what did Youko do?" Kurama asked his voice almost cracking.

"I was asking if you were okay and he showed enough of himself to tell me to go fly a kite." The raven haired told him.

"I am sorry Yusuke, it will not happen again." Kurama said and went to leave.

"Hey, you need to stop this. Hiei might not know what's going on, but I do…and for sanity's sake you need to end this…now." Yusuke said, pulling the red head to him and giving him a hug.

Kurama let his head rest on the raven haired's shoulder. Closing his eyes, he thought. 'Yes, this time it has gone too far.' He needed to mentally break down some doors and get some answers.

End Chapter 6 (part 2)

Lyrics to the song: _**Breaking the Habit**_ – by: _Linkin Park_

Memories consume, like opening the wound…I'm picking me apart again…You all assume, I'm safe here in my room (Unless I try to start again)

I don't want to be the one, the battle always choose…Cause inside I realize, that I'm the one confused

(Course)

Idon't know what's worth fighting for or way I have to scream…I don't know why I instigate and say what I don't mean…I don't know how I got this way, I know it's not alright…So I'm breaking the habit, I'm breaking the habit…Tonight

Clutching my cure, I tightly lock the door…I try to catch my breath again…I hurt much more, than anytime before…I had no options left again

I'll paint it on the walls, cause I'm the one at fault…I'll never fight again, and this is how it ends


	8. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Yusuke just about took the hinges off the door leading to the roof as he crashed through it. He knew he had his own problems to deal with, but 'damn it' he could 'not' let one of his best friends basically lose his sanity. What he was mad about the most, was not stopping it before it got this far, after witnessing an event that had finally opened his eyes to the situation.

_**(flashback, a month ago)**_

"Who could be knocking at this hour?" Keiko asked, rolling over and looking towards the front door, even though she had to look through the partially closed bedroom door to do it. The sun was just starting to rise.

Not too many people knew about the private entrance to the apartment from the back of the restaurant. You had to go through an unmarked door and then up a flight of stairs.

Yusuke rolled over and pulled his robe off the end of the bed, tying it around is waist as he racked his brain as to who it could be. Out of the few who did know about the door, only a couple had a key to unlock it and get up here.

Controlling a yawn, he opened the door to see a very scared red head standing on the small landing and looking like he was going to have a complete melt down.

"Kurama, everything alright?" Yusuke asked as he took in the look of the red head. He was wearing only jeans and a t-shirt, no shoes and his hair was disheveled.

"May…may I come…uh in please." Kurama asked starting to shake, but Yusuke didn't know if he was cold or if it was from nerves.

"Sure." Yusuke said and opened the door wider to allow the red head to come in. Closing the door, he turned to see Kurama just standing there like he didn't know what to do next.

"Have a seat." Yusuke said, motioning to a chair.

"Th…thank you." Kurama managed to get out and took the seat. Placing his hands between his legs, he started to rock slowly back and forth.

Keiko came out of the bedroom dressed in one of her Hawaiian muumuu dresses and tying up her hair. She looked to see Kurama sitting in the chair.

"Good morning Kurama." She said, but then noticed how he looked. "Hey, is everything okay?"

"I'm…I am fine, thank you, just…would like to talk to Yusuke please…if you don't mind." The red head managed to say. He was still lightly rocking while rubbing his hands together, though they were still between his legs.

"I'll head down." She said, having turned to Yusuke with a worried look.

"Thanks…I won't be too long." Yusuke said and gave her a kiss on the forehead followed by a reassuring nod. She left, leaving by the inside entrance.

"So Kurama, are you sure everything's alright, Hiei okay?" Yusuke asked as he took a seat opposite the red head.

"I'm…I am not…Kurama." The red head said and looked to the raven haired with a child's look of being caught doing something wrong and was about to be punished for it.

"Excuse me." Yusuke's said his eyes going wide as he found himself leaning forward in his chair.

"Kurama told you about um…us…I guess is the word." The red head said.

Who Yusuke guessed was now Shuiichi balled up in the chair, bringing his knees to his chest and turning sideways in the seat, trying to make himself small.

"Yes…you are Shuiichi?" Yusuke knew he was asking a stupid question, but didn't know what to say.

"No, I'm Youko." Shuiichi huffed rolling his eyes.

"Sorry." Yusuke whispered.

"It's okay…I didn't know where else to go." Shuiichi said softly.

"Why don't you tell me why you came here and where is Kurama?" Yusuke asked, deciding to see if he could get the boy to calm down and open up.

"Kurama's not waking up. I tried to get him up this morning and he is not responding. It is happening more and more lately, so I have been getting up and taking care of everything, like going to work, or running errands. When he wakes up, I fill him in on everything and then he takes over. No one knows the difference." Shuiichi said, still balled up, his voice still soft.

"Why come here?" Yusuke asked, still confused as to why the boy had come here, if he said he went to work or ran errands.

"I am starting to get worried that Kurama's not going to wake up one morning and I am going to be home with Hiei." Shuiichi said, resting his chin on his knees.

"Are you afraid of Hiei?" Yusuke wanted to know.

"Yes…I mean, no…I don't know…I'm still confused as to why Youko is in me and Hiei being a demon and I can't accept this male relationship. I do not want to be caught and Hiei be mad at me for being a ningen. He is in love with Kurama and his ties to Youko, not me." Shuiichi was rambling.

"It's okay." Yusuke said, trying to calm the boy. "I've been trying to tell Kurama that he needs to talk to Hiei about this and get it out in the open. Maybe you can persuade him to do it, tell him your side of the story and make him open up."

"I'll try." Shuiichi said and his head rolled before his body turned and sat straight in the chair.

Yusuke's eyes widened, he was a little taken aback as to the sudden change in the persona of the red head.

"I am sorry Yusuke…Shuiichi should not have come here. He usually goes to the temple…it will not happen again." This time it was Kurama who spoke. He then stood and headed to the door.

"That's it…you're going to just leave like that, after what Shuiichi's told me has been happening." Yusuke said and stood to try and block the figure from leaving.

"Let it be Yusuke." Kurama said firmly. "You have your own life to worry about, with a wife and a baby on the way. You have no room to worry about me and my relationship." He explained and moved around the raven haired to continue towards the door.

"Like hell." Yusuke said, bringing his arms up. "You walk out that door and I'll tell Hiei everything I know and Genkai, hell, I bet Kuwabara would love a good story."

"Yusuke." The red head sighed. "You would not do that." He said turning and was surprised to see the spirit gun aimed at him.

"Wanna bet." Yusuke smirked, wiggling his finger.

"I promise to tell him soon, I can handle it." Kurama said, turning and walking out the door, leaving Yusuke holding his gun. As the door closed, Yusuke dropped his arms and cursed himself, why did he have the feeling Kurama wasn't going to say a damn word.

_**(end flashback)**_

And 'damn it' he was right. Yusuke looked out over the city. He was confused and somewhat scared. He knew in a way he needed to, one, stay out of it. Kurama was right in saying he had his own life and future family to worry about, but two, he was a good friend, 'no' best friend and shouldn't best friends look out for each other. Kurama still did, even though it was a speck of dirt in a field. Kurama still paid for his meals and wanted to support the business. The red head agreed to be the god-father to the child and was always there when he needed to talk. He didn't even want to think about everything they had been through since they met all those years ago. So this time Yusuke decided to take action, he might lose the trust of one of his best friends, but if that friend was alive, well and sane, he could live with that. He needed to find Hiei first and have a talk.

a)a)a)a

He was surprised to find Hiei at the first place he looked, the apartment. He'd knocked even though he didn't expect to get an answer, but knew this was the logical place to start.

Hiei opened the door. "I don't have time to talk Yusuke, I need to find Kurama."

Yusuke could see the fire demon was packing, placing tank tops and a cloak in a backpack.

"Leaving?" Yusuke asked, eyebrows going up.

"Yes." The fire demon answered. "Mukuro called and wants me to check out some leads as to where Yomi might be hiding." He said, putting a few things in the pack before closing it and throwing it over his shoulder. "The sooner I go, the sooner I can get back. Do you know where Kurama went?"

"Yeah, he said he was going to the temple, how about I go along with you." Yusuke said as he racked his brain. Should he try and stop Hiei from leaving or would it be better if the fire demon left for awhile so he and the others could deal with Kurama.

End Chapter 7

Lyrics to the song: _**Drive **_- by: _The Cars_

Who's gonna tell you when…it's too late. Who's gonna tell you things…aren't so great

You can't go on…thinking…nothing's wrong. Who's gonna drive you home tonight

Who's gonna pick you up…when you fall. Who's gonna hang it up…when you call

Who's gonna pay attention…to your dreams. Who's gonna plug their ears…when you scream

(Course)

You can't go on…thinking…nothing's wrong. Who's gonna drive you home tonight

Who's gonna hold you down ….when you shake. Who's gonna come around…when you break


	9. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Kurama walked to the edge of the steps that led to the temple and took a seat. He was thinking about yesterday and the events that led up to Youko's comments to Yusuke.

Closing his eyes, he asked the boy._ 'Shuiichi…what happened yesterday?'_

Shuiichi told him everything. _'It does not make sense, It should not have happened.' _Kurama said when the boy was finished.

'_When I saw our body in the mirror, I was scared, I am sorry for not telling you what happened.'_ Shuiichi's voice held a hint of panic.

'_You know I can heal us faster than normal, we have been worse and have been okay.'_ Kurama tried to assure the boy.

'_Are you mad at me?'_ Shuiichi's voice now held a hint of fear in it.

'_No…I am not mad, more confused than anything._ Kurama stated, his eyes were still closed, but now he was biting his bottom lip.

The red head felt someone watching him. Opening his eyes, he looked to the top of the stairs to see Genkai standing with her arms crossed. "Are you coming, I'm not getting any younger you know." She said and stood there as he made his way up the stairs.

When he reached the top, she said. "I wondered if he was going to tell you." She then walked away, heading to the center garden area where they gave Puu his baths.

Kurama followed, letting out a sigh. It appeared she knew more than he realized.

As Genkai assured Puu, Kurama started getting things ready. He waited for the master to say something, for she was always known for her bluntness and he wasn't disappointed. "How long are you going to go on like this?" She asked as she soaped Puu's wing.

"How long what?" He asked, soaping Puu's chest and neck. He wasn't going to volunteer information.

"I'm old, not senile." She said. "Do you realize the danger you are putting yourself in by letting Youko out more?"

He didn't get to say anything as Hiei and Yusuke came out to the garden.

"Hey." Yusuke said, getting their attention.

"Hello." Kurama said back.

"Kurama, I need to talk to you." Hiei said, motioning for the red head to come to him so they could talk privately. As the red head walked to Hiei, Yusuke walked over to Puu and softly talked to him while rubbing his neck.

Scratching Puu's neck, Yusuke watched the two. Genkai was also watching as she continued to wash his wing.

"Is Hiei leaving?" She asked.

"Yes, he has a job to do for Mukuro." Yusuke answered, watching the red and black haired kiss each other and then Kurama give a hug to the smaller demon. Hiei had a look of disgust on his face, but patted the red head's back before turning and leaving the way they had come in.

"It's for the best, Kurama's not right and we need to figure out what's wrong." Yusuke said. He didn't realize he said it out loud until Genkai said.

"What do you know?" She was watching as the red head stood there, like he had lost his best friend.

"More than you realize." He said.

Kurama came back over and started in where he'd left off.

"Kurama, can you finish Puu. I have something for Yusuke to do and I need to show him first." Genkai said as she dropped her washcloth in the bucket.

"Of course." Kurama said and watched as the two walked into the temple.

Closing the door, Genkai took a seat at the low, round table. There was tea waiting and she poured herself a cup, saying. "Spill it."

Yusuke took a deep breath and started telling a story like no other.

She did not interrupt him as he talked, only occasionally nodded her head and muttered, but waited until he was done before speaking.

"It's what I thought." She said, taking a sip.

"Well don't leave me in the dark." Yusuke said.

She didn't get to answer as they heard a screeching outside. Running to the door, they saw Puu flapping his wings, like he was in distress. The bird then lowered his head, butting the prone figure of Kurama who was laying in a puddle of water.

a)a)a)a

While Genkai and Yukina got Kurama settled in a room, Yusuke contacted Kuwabara, who was over in a matter of minutes it seemed.

"What's up?" He asked, as he came barreling through the door.

"I don't know, Kurama passed out, Genkai and Yukina are with him now." Yusuke said, pacing in front of the closed door leading to the room.

"Where's the shrimp?" The orange haired asked, looking around.

"He had to go to the Makai for a few days." Yusuke answered, stopping to run a hand through his hair.

"Shouldn't we get him back here?" Kuwabara asked.

"No." Yusuke quickly said, seeing his friend's look, he explained. "Something's happening to Kurama and Hiei is part of the problem, its best if he stays away for awhile." He saw confusion on the man's face.

"I guess I need to fill you in on a few things, huh." The raven haired said and led them to the table where he prepared himself to tell the story again.

a)a)a)a

Kuwabara sat there in shock and confusion. He was honestly clueless and felt dumb because he didn't see it happening and now had no idea how to help. He admitted to himself that he was caught up with school and his upcoming wedding to Yukina, but that was no excuse for not seeing one of his good friends going down hill.

"And when did this start happening?" He asked.

"I'm sure it started after the night of my wedding and has been getting worse from there." Yusuke said.

"You…you mean…this has been going on for…six…MONTHS!" Kuwabara ended up yelling, getting mad. "And you knew about it and didn't do anything?" He about yelled that part as well.

"You know Kurama…" The raven haired tried to explain. "He kept saying he would deal with it, what would you of done …?" He accused back.

"Something…I mean…." Kuwabara stammered.

Genkai and Yukina came out of the room, cutting off any more talk. Closing the door, they came over and sat.

"How is he?" Yusuke asked.

"Physically, he's fine. It's his mental stability I'm worried about." Genkai said, pouring tea.

"When Kurama passed out, why didn't Shuiichi come out and cover." Kuwabara asked. Now that he knew it was Shuiichi's spirit energy he felt yesterday.

"I don't know." Genkai said and took a sip of tea before adding. "What I do know…is that Kurama is ceasing to exist."

"WHAT!" They all said in disbelief.

"When you told me about the three personalities, it started making sense, now that Youko is allowed out without supervision, Kurama is no longer needed." Genkai said it like it was an everyday occurrence.

"Care to explain to the rest of us grandma." Yusuke said.

Ignoring the boy, she explained as best she could. "Kurama is the middle of Shuiichi and Youko. See Shuiichi as the head side of a coin and Youko as tails. Kurama is the space between the two. He shows all of the ningen characteristics, such as emotions. But then there are his demon characteristics, such as controlling plants and ability to heal fast. He keeps the two on an even playing field, Yusuke…you said that Kurama said Youko was no longer communicating with him."

Yusuke nodded.

"Then they don't need Kurama anymore." She said.

"I'm still confused." Kuwabara said.

Genkai continued. "Shuiichi no longer needs to be afraid of Youko, since he is 'staying in his room' so to speak. So the ningen is coming out more and doing his normal routine. He only needs Kurama now when he feels threaten, scared, or if Youko comes out."

"Gods, this is confusing." Yusuke sighed, laying back against the cushions.

"He's going from three personalities to two. He no longer needs Kurama to be the diplomat for them." Genkai said.

"What about Hiei's role." Yukina asked.

"I'm not sure." She admitted. "Only that with Hiei spending time with Youko, it's allowing Youko to be more himself and become stronger. He probably has no idea what he's doing." She thought for a moment. "With Hiei leaving, Kurama was no longer needed."

"Then what Kuwabara said…about Shuiichi coming out." Yusuke said.

"I don't know…we need to wait and see if he or Youko wakes up." Genkai said.

"I always assumed Kurama was Youko and Shuiichi was just his ningen name, I mean I never second guessed it. I thought Youko was the stronger, cocker, more confidant side of him…." Kuwabara trailed off as he tried to think of words to explain.

"I thought that way too." Yusuke said softly, lost in his own thoughts.

The door to the bedroom slid open and Youko walked out.

"What is going on?" He asked as he saw the looks on their faces.

"Why are you out?" Yusuke asked sarcastically.

"I can not sense Kurama and Shuiichi's door is closed." He said, with a little sadness in his voice.

"Youko, can you get Shuiichi to come out?" Genkai asked.

"No, I never can get the ningen boy to come out, he is afraid of me, only Kurama can handle him." Youko stated.

"Well try. We need to talk to him and get some more answers." Genkai said, taking a sip of tea.

"Well, since I am out, I am going to go enjoy my time. I have only been out at night and once during the day, so if you will excuse me." Youko said and headed to the door leading out to the center garden.

"Youko." Genkai said, not turning to look at the spirit yoko, but looking at the wall in front of her. "Remember your manners…do not leave these grounds."

"Yes master." He mocked, before heading outside.

"You all need to watch him." Genkai said, addressing the others.

"Why?"

"Youko is a demon and his demon instincts will kick in if Kurama's not here to control him." Genkai said.

"Great." They all muttered, just what they needed, a vain, holier than thou, spirit yoko running around.

a)a)a)a

A little while later Genkai walked up to Yusuke as he stared out at Youko, who was still in the center garden. Yusuke had been watching the fox talk and play with Puu.

"How's he doing?" She asked, also taking in the sight.

"Fine, I guess." He shrugged. "What are we going to do if Shuiichi doesn't come back?" The boy asked softly.

"All we have is time…we wait." She said and walked off.

End chapter 8

Lyrics to the song: _**Easier to Run**_-by: _Linkin Park_

(Course)

It's easier to run…Replacing this pain with something more

It's so much easier to go…Than face all this pain here all alone

Something has been taken from deep inside of me. The secret I've kept locked away no one can ever see. Wounds so deep they never show, they never go away. Like moving pictures in my head for years and years they've played

(If I could change I would take back the pain I would) (Retrace every wrong move that I made I would) (If I could stand up and take the blame I would) (If I could take all the shame to the grave I would)

Sometimes I remember the darkness of my past. Bringing back these memories I wish I didn't have. Sometimes I think of letting go and never looking back. And never moving forward so there'd never be a path. Just watching in the sun. All of my helplessness inside. Pretending I don't feel misplaced. It's so much simpler to change


	10. Chapter 9

This chapter gets a little tense at the end.

Chapter 9

Youko could sense he was being watched and said to Puu. "You know you are a special bird, to bad you are half of your master."

Yusuke walked out after hearing the comment. "And just what's that suppose to mean?" He said, walking over to Puu, who in turn, wrapped his long neck around the boy's shoulder and began to 'puu' softly.

"Nothing, it was just a way to get you out here." Youko smirked.

"I'm out here." Yusuke shot back.

"So you are…so now let me guess, since you have been keeping an eye on me for the past hour or so, that you are…my body guard." Youko smirked, looking to the raven haired when he didn't get a response, he guessed again. "No, then you are watching to make sure I do not do anything to jeopardize the ningen boy?" He said. When he saw a flicker in the chocolate eyes, he knew he'd guessed right.

"Come now, why do you care for the boy, he was only 'my host.' He had the ability to create Kurama, I will give him that, but the boy is worthless." Youko said.

"That 'boy' saved your life." Yusuke said.

"I should have killed the boy's soul when I had the chance. I knew I was making a mistake when I decided to let him live." Youko spat.

"Kurama said you were too weak to kill him." Yusuke stated, his anger was rising as he thought about the yoko killing the innocent ningen soul for his own greedy use.

"I still could have done it when I awakened, but by then Kurama was there and he kept me on a tight leash." Youko spat again at the tone Yusuke's voice had taken.

"You weren't strong enough to beat Kurama were you?" Yusuke asked, something had him thinking about what all Kurama had told him and then he thought about the first time Youko had made his appearance. He was not there, but the others had filled him in, something to do with a smoke and Kurama regressing to his true form. 'Youko almost always keeps his door closed, unless he is summoned, forces his way out, or appears without his control.' He knew Kurama had been summoning the yoko for Hiei and he has been forced out by potions, but how many times has he forced his way. He has seen Kurama's eyes turn gold and his hair get silver streaks, but Youko rarely fully appeared. Was Kurama controlling it? And Youko had made a comment to Hiei about 'always having to finish Kurama's battles for some reason or another'. He made a metal note to talk to Hiei about that.

"You do not know what you are talking about." Youko's voice got deep, holding an edge that could cut ice.

Knowing he had hit a nerve with his remark, Yusuke shrugged. "I know Kurama."

"That half ningen could not keep me 'contained' as you call it." Youko said, moving to stand in front of the former tantei and flaring his energy.

"So you say." Yusuke muttered, standing his ground. He'd never went one on one with Youko, but in a way was looking forward to seeing who would come out on top if they did battle it out.

Youko stood there, his anger pouring off him in ripples. Yusuke still maintained his ground with Puu standing firmly behind him. He had un-wrapped his neck and moved into a protective stance behind his 'master', after feeling the tension in the air.

Youko closed his eyes and took a step back. Yusuke watched as the fox seemed to be having a dizzy spell.

Opening his eyes, Yusuke almost gasped as he saw green blended in with the gold. When he looked to the silver hair, he saw red highlights. Trying to stay calm and showing indifference to what was going on, he waited.

"I need to lie down. I do not feel well." Youko finally said and turned to head back inside. As he opened the door, Genkai was standing there having been watching the exchange.

"You can stay in the room you were in earlier." She said and waited until Youko disappeared behind the door before walking out to Yusuke.

"Well that was interesting." She said.

"I think I hit a nerve." Yusuke said, rubbing Puu's neck, trying to calm him.

"Maybe we should hit a few more." Genkai said, placing her hands behind her back.

a)a)a)a

Night fell and the gang was playing cards. Since it was Saturday night, Kuwabara didn't have classes and his homework could wait. Yusuke had called Keiko and explained what was happening, she took it better than he thought she would. They decided to take turns watching the fox, to one, make sure he didn't leave the grounds, and two, since Yusuke had caused either Kurama or Shuiichi to show themselves, though only a smidgen, then just maybe one of them will appear soon, so one of them wanted to be awake.

At midnight they all called it quits and went to their rooms with Genkai saying she would take the first watch. She stayed at the table with a fresh pot of tea. Yukina's room was next to Youko's and she paused to slide open the door, wanting to take a quick look to make sure everything was okay. The moon light was just at the right angle and she gasped, closing the door and running to get Genkai. Hearing noises outside their rooms, Yusuke and Kuwabara came out.

"What's happened?" They asked.

Genkai slid the door back and they all peeked in to see a red headed figure laying on the futon.

"He came out." Kuwabara whispered.

"Is it Kurama or Shuiichi though?" Yukina whispered back.

"I don't want to wake him. He has been through enough right now. Let's just hope he awakens that way in the morning." Genkai said, closing the door. "I'll still keep watch." She added, walking back to her tea.

a)a)a)a

The next morning the gang walked in to find Kuwabara asleep at the table, he was snoring worse than a freight train.

"Well if that doesn't wake him." Yusuke said and pushed the orange haired hard enough to push him off the table. Hitting the floor, Kuwabara jumped.

"I'm awake…I didn't fall asleep." He said, yawning.

"Yeah right, did you check on him?" Yusuke asked, taking a seat.

"I checked on him when I relieved Genkai." He said.

Looking at his watch, Yusuke asked. "And when was that?"

"About 5." Kuwabara answered, looking over to see the watch.

It was now a little after 8. "I'll go check." Yusuke said and got up to head to the room. Sliding back the door, he cursed. The room was empty and the window was opened.

He ran back to tell the others.

"He's gone." He yelled.

"What!"

"Kuwabara can you sense him on the grounds." Yusuke asked.

The boy closed his eyes and reached out. Opening them, he looked to the raven haired. "No." He said…man was he feeling guilty.

"If he has left the grounds then he must be in his ningen form." Genkai said.

"What makes you say that?" Kuwabara asked.

"Youko said he would not leave, he may be an arrogant demon, but he will keep his word." She said.

"Then let's go to the apartment." Yusuke said and headed out.

Not seeing any sighs that the red head was at the apartment, they headed to the park.

a)a)a)a

The red head made his way through the park as the sun rose over the city. He was thinking he should head home and call his okasan, but decided to take a walk in the park.

Now that he was sure the spirit yoko was no longer in him, he was feeling good about life. Now maybe he could live a normal life and maybe that fire demon wouldn't come back.

Not paying attention to where he was walking, for he had been walking awhile, the lean figure came upon an area that was secluded from the rest. Walking into the deep foliage, he continued to think about what he needed to do, but stopped in his tracks as he saw three men standing on the path. They looked like they had been drinking and appeared to be drunk.

"Well, well, looky what we have here." One of them slurred, seeing the boy.

"I say we have a piece of ass." Another one said, also checking the figure over.

"Is it ass or pussy?" The third one said.

"Let's find out." The first one said, rushing the red head.

The red head went to run, but was grabbed. He cried out and tried to get away, but the other two had ran over and started to hit him. He fell on his stomach and then felt weight on his hips. His mind was screaming and he could have sworn he heard the spirit yoko laughing at him. Closing his eyes and praying that what he knew was going to happen wouldn't, he heard a yell.

"Get away from him." Yusuke appeared and hit the one that had been on the red head's hips. Kuwabara came right behind him and hit the one who was trying to kiss the boy and had been holding his arms.

The third one who had been holding the red head's feet jumped up and went to fight, but because he was drunk, the punch he threw missed. Yusuke hit him and he fell to the ground unconscious.

He turned to find the red head to see the boy had pulled himself into a ball and trying in vain not to shake, but most of all not to cry.

"Kurama?" Kuwabara said, worried.

Yusuke looked to the taller boy, who in turned shrugged.

"Shuiichi." Yusuke said softly, lowering himself on the balls of his feet.

The big green eyes looked to him with fear. "Let's get you back to the temple." Yusuke said softly and went to touch the boy, but the red head jerked back.

"Why?" He heard.

"Why what?" Yusuke asked, trying to stay calm and reassure the boy.

"Why did Kurama not protect me and why did Youko laugh?" Shuiichi whispered.

Barely hearing the words, Yusuke's eyes went wide and he looked to Kuwabara.

"I don't know." Yusuke finally said, looking back to the red head. "But let's get you back to the temple, you'll be safe there." He helped the boy up and the two led him back to the temple. Hopefully where they could get some answers.

End Chapter 9

Lyrics to the song: **From the Inside** – by: _Linkin Park_

I don't who to trust, your surprise (everyone feels so far away from me)

Happy thoughts sift through dust and the lies (trying not to break, but I'm so tired of this deceit) (Every time I try to make myself get back on my feet) (all I ever think about it is) (all the tiring time between) (and how trying to put my trust in you takes so much out of me)

(Course)

Take everything from the inside and throw is all away…cause I swear, for the last time, I won't trust myself with you

Tension is building inside steadily (everyone feels so far away from me) Happy thoughts forcing there way out of me (trying not to break, but I'm so tired of this deceit) (every time I try to make myself get back on my feet) (all I ever think about is this) (All the tiring time between) (and how trying to put my trust in you takes so much out of me)

I won't waste myself on you…you…you…waste myself on you…you…you.

I'll take everything from the inside and throw it all away…cause I swear, for the last time, I won't trust myself with you…everything from the inside and just throw it all away…cause I swear, for the last time, I won't trust myself with you….


	11. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Yusuke closed the door to the room and let out a big sigh. Rubbing his face, he looked over to the table to see the others staring at him.

"Well?" Genkai asked, as he made his way over and took a seat.

"He's sleeping." He said, pouring himself a cup of tea.

"What did he say?" Kuwabara asked. There was worry clearly evident on his face mixed with confusion as to what was going on with their friend.

"He said he didn't feel Youko anymore and thought the yoko was gone, he wanted to get home, call his okasan and move on with his life." Yusuke said.

"Did you tell him?" Genkai asked, taking a sip of tea.

"Yeah…I explained." Yusuke said in a frustrated breath. Shuiichi insisted on only talking to Yusuke, so he'd stayed to answer questions and explain that the spirit yoko was not gone. While the two talked, Yukina had come in with a tray of tea and seeing only one cup, the raven haired knew that Genkai must have had her put a sedative in it. He made sure the red head drank it.

"How did he take it?" She asked.

"How did you expect him to take it?" Yusuke huffed, running a hand through his hair. "He's scared and confused. He hates being weak, he hates having a spirit demon in him that doesn't give a damn about him or anything else…he doesn't know what to do…" His voice trailed off as he became more flustered.

"Calm Urameshi…we're all scared and confused too." Kuwabara said softly.

The door to the room opened and Youko walked out. Seeing the looks on their faces, he smirked. "With him asleep, it is my turn, so if you will excuse me." He said then headed outside and disappeared into the woods.

"Damn him." Yusuke said as he watched the yoko fade into the foliage.

Genkai put her cup down and the others looked to her. "Well, now we know one thing, when Shuiichi is asleep Youko's out and vise versa." She stated and got up to head towards a room in the back. "I think I'm going to do some research." She told them before disappearing down the hall.

a)a)a)a

It was a beautiful Sunday afternoon as Hiei made his way to the temple. He was worried about Kurama, after not finding him at the apartment and appeared to not have been there for days. He hoped nothing happened, the mission he was sent on had been a dead end and he was starting to fear that it may have been a diversion so Yomi could go after the fox. He hoped he was wrong and more than hoped the red head was at the temple.

Making it to the porch, he was surprised to see Yusuke and Kuwabara sitting there with looks of despair on their faces.

"What's with you two?" He smirked.

"Hiei." They both gasped when they saw the fire demon.

"Where's Kurama?" He asked.

"Um…uh…you see, something…" Yusuke didn't want to be the one to tell him, he really didn't.

"Where's the fox…so help me…if he is hurt." Hiei growled, his voice rising.

"Calm Hiei, so far nothing serious has happened." Genkai said from the doorway, having felt Hiei's return.

Hiei was staring daggers at the master. "Come, I will fill you in." She said turning, not even waiting to see if he would follow.

Giving the other two a glare, the fire demon walked past them into the temple.

a)a)a)a

What felt like an eternity later, the door slammed opened and Hiei stormed out. Yusuke and Kuwabara had stayed out on the porch to give them privacy. Yusuke gulped as he felt the energy rising off the small demon, Kuwabara was physically shaking from it. The thought 'if looks could kill' came to mind as Hiei glared at the raven haired and then leaped off into the woods.

"Well, he can't be blaming you entirely." Kuwabara said with a nervous laugh.

"What makes you say that?" Yusuke said, gulping again.

"Your head's still attached to your shoulders." The orange haired noted.

"Good point." Yusuke whispered.

a)a)a)a

'Damn it.' Hiei thought. How could he not have seen it? And why the hell didn't Kurama say something, he talked to Yusuke, why not him. 'Wait a minute.' He paused and sat down on a tree branch. Maybe Kurama had been telling him something was wrong and he had been too stupid to figure it out. But why did the stubborn red head not tell him flat out? He remembered the hug before he left. Kurama asked for a kiss, he didn't mind that part, even if the others were watching, but Kurama asked for a hug. He didn't care for those. He knew he couldn't control the look on his face as he hugged the red head and patted him on the back. Kurama whispered in his ear that he would not ask for one again and things would be better when he got back. 'Better.' What had he meant? Did Kurama know then that he was 'going away' as Genkai put it? He didn't understand 'multiple personality', but Genkai said she was finding out more about it. And here he had finally admitted to himself that he 'loved' the red head as he laid alone those cold nights out in the woods of Makai. He wanted the red head beside him and he finally allowed himself to believe he was happy, happy with Kurama, but now…

Feeling a familiar ki, he looked down to see a silver fox laying in a clearing. It dawned on him that this was the same spot he and Youko had sparred at the other day. Youko was laying in a patch of sun, his five tails fanned out behind him. Jumping down, he walked over and waited.

Hiei stared and wondered if the fox was asleep, but then saw blood red eyes watching him. He was about to say something, when he was attacked and found himself on his back with the large silver fox licking him on his face, neck and even his hair.

"_Welcome back little one, oh how I have missed you."_ He heard mentally, as the licking continued.

"Get the hell off me you perverted fox." Hiei all but yelled, pushing the fox off and rolling the other way.

Transforming into his more ningen form, Youko sat there pouting. "I thought you liked my perverseness." He said.

"Where's Kurama?" Hiei growled. He was in a crouched position and ready to draw his sword if needed.

"You might say, he no longer exists and now I am all yours." Youko purred. "We can return to the Makai and live happily ever after…just me and you as my prize possession."

"I am not a possession." Hiei said.

Youko stood and walked towards the smaller demon, saying. "Come now, you like what I have to offer, I also have been offering myself to you. No one else except Kuronue has had the honor."

"Stay back." Hiei growled, drawing his sword.

"What?" The yoko paused. "Are you scared of me? Come now, put the sword away, we have a lot of making up to do." He stood there with the sword at his neck, not afraid and even leaned into the blade, nicking himself.

"I…I…thought you were Kurama." Hiei stammered. "I thought this side of you was the more confidant side and wanted him to be more open in his relationship with me. I didn't know…I never thought…" His hands started to shake until the sword fell loosely from his grip. It hit the ground as the events of the last six months played out in his head.

Youko smiled and pulled Hiei's chin up to look at him. "Let us have some fun and then we will talk." He purred.

"No!" Hiei swatted the hand away and stepped back. "I want to talk now." He growled.

Youko sighed and sat down. "As you wish." He whispered.

Hiei took a seat away from the fox. "What happened?" He also whispered, not wanting to believe what he'd been told.

"What do you mean?" Youko asked and then said. "Have you talked to…"

Hiei nodded. "Genkai." He whispered.

"Well then…you know all of it. Kurama was created to control me and comfort the ningen. Since I was staying out of the way, as you requested earlier. The boy was able to get his life back and now I can kill him so that only I remain." Youko stated.

"What?" Hiei looked up, not quite sure if he'd heard correctly.

"I will kill the boy and we can return to the Makai, is that not what you wanted?" Youko asked.

"No, I wanted Kurama to be more confident with himself, he was having trouble controlling his ningen emotions around me and I thought getting him in his fox form would help him…I…he didn't tell me it was you…I." Hiei's voice dropped.

"Sorry. All you managed to do was make me stronger and for that…I thank you." Youko smiled.

"Don't you care about the ningen?" Hiei asked.

"No, as I told the tantei, I should have killed him when I had the chance." Youko stated.

"Could you have survived killing him?" Hiei asked.

Youko shrugged. "Yes, I believe so. I would have been weak, but I would not have had to battle the boy's mind. I would have just fed off his body until I was strong enough to return to the Makai."

Yukina came around the corner. "There you are. Welcome back Hiei." She said and smiled at him. "I wanted to let you know dinner was ready." She smiled again, getting ready to turn and leave.

"Such beauty." Youko said. "It is really a shame you have not found your brother yet Yukina. I am sure if he knew you were getting mated, he would want to be here for you."

"I would like nothing more than to have him here by my side." She said, holding her small hand to her chest. "Do you know him?" She asked, looking to the fox.

Smirking at Hiei he said. "Why yes, very well, you might say."

Hiei growled.

"Oh please, what news do you know? I do so wish to inform him that I am to be married." She pleaded with her hands clasped in front of her and with hope in her red eyes.

"You need to ask Hiei, has he not been the one looking for him these past several years?" Youko said, watching as the fire demon started to sweat.

Hiei gulped and looked to the girl.

"Well tell her, you still have her necklace around your neck, do you not." Youko said, knowing all too well the fire demon still wore her necklace along side his.

"Hn." Hiei reached up and pulled the necklace off, handing it over, he said softly. "Here, I wanted to give this back, and…I'm sorry…I could not find any information on him." And then lowered his red eyes.

Looking at the necklace, Yukina rolled it in her hand. Something was not quite right about it. "I don't think this is mine." She said, looking back to Hiei.

"It's yours." Hiei tried not to growl.

"It has a different energy to it, kind of like mine, but different." She said, holding the necklace up to the sun, so she could look at it.

"Brother." She whispered.

"What?" Hiei said, his eyes going wide.

"Where did you find this?" Her voice rising. "This is my brother's. See the blackness in the center. Mine is pure, his is not, because he is part…fire." Her lips trembled as she looked to Hiei. He had pulled the other necklace out when she whispered brother. He'd always thought the two gems were identical, but now he felt like an idiot. He watched as she took in the sight of the other necklace before her eyes rolled and she fainted.

Picking her up and taking her to the temple, Hiei placed her on a futon. Genkai came in and asked what happened, while Kuwabara tried not to yell at Hiei.

"She fainted." He said.

"What made her do that?" Kuwabara asked, holding her hand as Genkai placed a cold cloth on her forehead.

"She found out I'm her brother." Hiei said then took off. He had a fox to kill.

"Hiei…wait…we need to talk." Yusuke said, stopping the demon on the porch.

"Not now Yusuke!" Hiei growled. He was going to make Youko pay for the trick he pulled.

"Yes now. Genkai found out some things and I want to talk." Yusuke said, placing his hand on Hiei's shoulder and stopping him before he could flee.

Hiei sighed and turned around.

End Chapter 10

Lyrics to the song: _**Crawling**_ – by: _Linkin Park_

(Course)

Crawling in my skin, these wounds they will not heal, fear is how I fall, confusing what is real

There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface, consuming, confusing. This lack of self control I fear is never ending, controlling. To find myself again, my walls are closing in.

(Without a sense of confidence, I'm convinced that there's just too much pressure to take) I've felt this way before, so insecure

Discomfort endlessly has pulled itself upon me, distracting, reacting. Against my will I stand beside my own reflection, it's haunting. How I can't seem to find myself again, my walls are closing in.


	12. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

"Yes now, Genkai found out some things and I want to talk." Yusuke said, placing his hand on Hiei's shoulder and stopping him before he could flee.

Hiei sighed and turned around.

"I have nothing to say to you." Hiei growled.

"Fine, then I'll talk." Yusuke said. "Look, for what it's worth, I'm sorry, you know how stubborn Kurama can be, he said he could handle it and said he would tell you."

Hiei rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, not really wanting to hear this right now.

"Hiei, did you know what you were doing when you asked to spend time with Youko?" Yusuke asked.

"That is none of your business." Hiei spat.

"Yes, it is." They both turned to see Genkai standing at the door. "Come, we need to talk." She said and turned to go back in.

a)a)a)a

Sitting around the table, no one wanted to be the one to start talking. Kuwabara was staying with Yukina. She had awakened, but was still shaky from the news.

Genkai seemed to be formulating her thoughts as she sipped her tea. Finally she turned to Hiei. "You have been with Kurama more than the rest of us, what has he been like these past months?" She asked.

Hiei leaned back with a huff. He'd be damned if he was going to explain his and the fox's relationship to them.

"Hiei." She tried again. "I need to know what his emotional and mental states have been like. I knew there was something wrong when he was showing up here early in the morning."

"He has been coming here?" Hiei whispered. Thinking about the times he woke up and the bed was empty. Kurama had been telling him he had been going to work and/or running errands.

Genkai nodded. "He never bothered me and would mostly stay in the garden with Puu."

"Do you think it was Shuiichi?" Yusuke asked. He'd told Genkai about the boy showing up at his apartment that time and the comment from Kurama about how the boy usually came to the temple.

Genkai only nodded. "What happened the nights before he would leave in the morning?" She asked, looking to Hiei.

The fire demon tried to control his anger and the pink coming to his cheeks. "We would have sex." He said.

"With Kurama or Youko?" She asked, showing indifference, just wanting information.

"Both, but not on the same night." He said, trying to also stay calm, he knew the master needed all the information she could get, if they were to help the fox.

"Youko was coming out on the nights of the full moon." Genkai said. At first she had been wondering if the full moon had played a role in Youko getting stronger. But, had finally realized it had been a combination of things.

Hiei looked to Yusuke, who shrugged. "I told her everything I knew." He said.

'Kurama must have told him a lot more than I realized.' Hiei thought.

"Hiei, tell me how you view Kurama and his demon/ningen sides." Genkai said, pouring more tea and sitting back.

"When I first met him." Hiei started. "I thought he was possessing the ningen boy, using him until he was stronger. I never knew Youko and didn't know he was Youko for a long time. He told me his name was Kurama and that he had been a spirit yoko. I remember when I introduced him to Gouki. I knew then he was Youko and he told Gouki that it was a merger not a possession. I still didn't understand. I always assumed Kurama was Youko only in a ningen body, using the name Kurama so no one would know he was Youko and because of the ningen form, he had ningen emotions. I thought he hated them and was happy when he was able to finally transform to his yoko form. I was really shocked to hear that he wanted to stay here in Ningenkai and live this kind of life." He stopped when he saw the looks on the other two's faces.

"What." He said.

"That was kind of the way I saw him too." Yusuke said.

"So you thought letting Youko out would help with his ningen side?" Genkai asked.

"Yes, Kurama told me several times that his ningen side did not like the relationship we were having, but that his demon side wanted it." Hiei paused. "Tell me now what the hell has happened."

"Kurama told Yusuke that he has 'multiple personalities' and in a way, is correct." She started.

"In a way?" Hiei said, losing patience.

"A multiple personality person can have one to a hundred different personalities to them. Each one created to handle a different situation. But…in this case, Youko was not created by Shuiichi's mind, he already existed, so Shuiichi created Kurama to handle him." Genkai said.

Hiei thought about everything she had told him earlier, Kurama going away because Youko was no longer bothering Shuiichi and being his ningen self because of it. "So this is my fault." He whispered and cursed himself.

"Did you want Youko…you never did like the fact that Kurama had ningen emotions and always called him weak for having them." Yusuke voice rose, he was mad at the fire demon for what he had done.

"No!" Hiei yelled and sat up to stare at the boy. "I only wanted him to realize that we could be together and that it was natural for two male demons to be together. He needed to remember what he was, a demon." His energy flared.

"He's more ningen than you think." Genkai said, trying to cut the tension in the room.

"You said you had some information, spill it woman." Hiei growled, turning to her.

Ignoring him, she took a sip of tea. "Do you want Youko or Shuiichi?" She asked.

"I want Kurama." Hiei said. "I do not care for Youko. I've heard too many stories and I may be ruthless, but I am nothing compared to him." He sat back, thinking about the comment Youko made about him being a possession.

"And Shuiichi?" She added.

"I…I don't know. I care for the boy, I…don't know." Hiei whispered, looking down in shame for the thoughts he was having.

"No matter what Hiei thinks, we need to stop Youko. I don't want him to hurt Shuiichi." Yusuke said.

"Then we need to get Shuiichi to come out and take control, but you might be disappointed in what happens." Genkai said.

"What the hell are you getting at?" Hiei spat.

"In multiple personalities, there is a way for them to become one. How that can happen is for the true personality to forcefully merge with the others and combined themselves into one whole being, but…the outcome might not be what you want." She informed.

"But Shuiichi is scared and in a way weak. There will be no way he could do that." Yusuke said.

"Youko wants to kill the boy and return to the Makai." Hiei said.

"He can't do that." Genkai said.

"Why, he said he's strong enough to survive." Hiei said.

"He's lying." She said, taking a sip of tea.

"What!" Came out in stereo.

Sitting the cup down, she said. "He can not live without the boy. He is still feeding off his energy. He may be able to control him and contain him so he can be 'out', but he can not destroy him and survive. If he would have killed the soul in the beginning, he may have survived. We will never know that though." She paused to let the news set in.

"How did you figure out he wouldn't survive if…?" Yusuke asked.

"Because you saw it yourself." She said, looking to the boy. "When one sleeps the other is out. Even Youko said it earlier. He may think he could survive in the Makai by hiding when he sleeps, but then what would Shuiichi do when he was awake. Youko would have to lock himself up at night."

"Hey, Youko made the comment once about how he always had to come out and finish Kurama's fights." Yusuke said.

"It might be a defense mechanism." Genkai said. Seeing the raised eyebrows she continued. "Kurama said he had to go and comfort/protect Shuiichi." She looked to Yusuke and got a nod. "Kurama knew that if Shuiichi died they all would. Kurama would force Youko to emerge, being the stronger side of them, to handle the situation."

"I told Youko that he was not strong enough to fight Kurama." Yusuke said.

"And you might be right." Genkai agreed. "Shuiichi is stronger than he thinks, he created Kurama and needs to realize he is Kurama and can put Youko in his place."

"How do we get them to merge?" Hiei asked, still trying to understand.

"Like I said, we need Shuiichi to confront Youko and tell him he's in charge. What did Kurama say his mind was like?" Genkai asked, turning back to Yusuke.

"Um." Yusuke looked to Hiei and saw hurt and confusion in the crimson eyes. "He said it was like he was in a hallway, Youko and Shuiichi being in their own room on either side."

"And Shuiichi never really goes into Youko's room." Genkai said. Thinking and studying her cup.

Yusuke nodded.

"Shuiichi needs to go into Youko's room." She finally stated.

"How are we going to get him to do that?" Yusuke asked with raised eyebrows.

"Hiei's going to make him do it." She said, seeing the shocked look on the fire demon's face.

End chapter 11

Lyrics to the song: _**Don't Stay**_ – by: _Linkin Park_

Sometimes I need to remember just to breathe. Sometimes I need you to stay away from me. Sometimes I'm in disbelief I didn't know. Somehow I need you to go.

(Course)

Don't stay…forget our memories, forget our possibilities…What you are changing me into. Just give myself back and don't stay…forget our memories, forget our possibilities…Take all your faithlessness with you…just give myself back and don't stay.

Sometimes I feel like I trusted you too well. Sometimes I just feel like screaming at myself. Sometimes I'm in disbelief I didn't know. Somehow I need to be alone.

I don't need you anymore, I don't want to be ignored…I don't need one more say of you wasting me away…I don't need you anymore, I don't want to be ignored…I don't need one more say of you wasting me with no apologies.


	13. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Hiei was standing on the porch looking out into the woods. They had come up with a plan. Yusuke told him about the incident where Kurama almost showed himself after being provoked by him. So they wanted Hiei to push some buttons and see if he could get Kurama to emerge. Well, he did need to make Youko pay for his trick, thus he had a lot of buttons to push.

Getting ready to head out into the woods to find the fox, he was stopped by a voice.

"So it was you all along? You're Yukina's brother? I don't understand why you didn't tell her? I mean, she respects you and cares for you as a friend…and you lied to her." Kuwabara said softly, but was angry. How dare Hiei let Yukina go all these years, standing right in front of her and letting her go on and on about how much she missed her brother and wanted him by her side.

"I don't need to explain myself to you." Hiei said, not turning around.

"She wants to talk to you." Kuwabara said. "I don't know why, I wouldn't give you the time…." He didn't finish as he was slammed against the wall, a sword at his neck. Hiei's nostrils were flaring as he placed the blade at the boy's jugular.

"Would you want the forbidden one as your brother?" Hiei hissed.

"What does that have to do with anything?" Kuwabara said, not even blinking an eye. He's had the same sword at his neck many times and knew the fire demon would not hurt him.

"I don't expect you to understand." Hiei sighed, lowering his sword and turning away with guilt and hatred on his face.

"Explain it to me then." The orange haired said. "Kurama seems to love the forbidden one, so why can't his sister love him too."

Hiei was gone in a flash.

a)a)a)a

Damn, damn, damn. It was bad enough having to deal with his emotions over Kurama and the situation he was in, but now thanks to that damn fox, he had his sister to deal with as well. Someone's going to pay. Hiei landed in the clearing where he was last talking to the fox. Expecting to see the silver form, he was completely shocked to see the red head sitting on a fallen log.

Approaching cautiously, Hiei walked up to the figure. "Kurama?" He said softly, not wanting to frighten him.

"Uh." The red head turned and stood, surprise written all over his face. "Oh Hiei, you are back, um, I just came out here for some air. Are you hungry, we can head back to the apartment and I can make that special dinner." The red head spoke calmly, but was shaking ever so slightly. He was trying to hide it, which only made it worse.

Hiei sighed. He didn't need to be told that this wasn't Kurama, but the ningen boy. If he looked close enough, he could see that the eyes were not quite as green, they were dull and missing the sparks that he liked to see. The hair was also somewhat dull, not the rich blood, lush, that his fingers found enjoyable to run through, the hair was flat and faded.

"No that's okay…Shuiichi." Hiei said, relaxing his pose so as to not intimidate the boy. He saw a flicker of fear, but just like Kurama, it was gone in a blink of an eye, making you wonder if it had ever been there.

"Why are you calling me that? It is my ningen name, you never call me that." As hard as he tried, the red head could not keep his voice from cracking and he started backing up, trying to put distance between them.

"I'm not going to hurt you." Hiei said softly, walking towards the boy.

"You do not care for ningens, you are a demon." Shuiichi said, still walking backwards. He started tripping over roots, but was catching himself before he fell completely.

"I care for you." Hiei said. Gods he hated this, he was no good with his emotions, how the hell was he going to make the boy believe him?

"No." Red hair shaking. "You care for Kurama and you always called him weak because he showed emotions." Shuiichi said.

"I will admit I don't care for ningen emotions." Hiei said. "They can make you weak, but you are not weak, you have a great power…." He was cut off.

"You mean Youko has a great power and Kurama has some as well, but not me, I'm just a ningen." Shuiichi said, he'd stopped and was standing his ground.

"No…you are Kurama." Hiei said, also stopping.

"What." Shuiichi laughed. "Me, Kurama, I can't do the things he does, he doesn't show fear and has power to control plants and …" This time Hiei cut him off.

"You created Kurama to do all that because you were too young to understand at the time."

"I…did...me…What about Youko?" Shuiichi stuttered sitting down hard on the ground, his shaking returning.

Taking a seat as well, Hiei explained everything he knew about the spirit yoko and what he'd done.

Shuiichi didn't say anything as the news sank in. After a few minutes he said. "So you are telling me that I created Kurama to control Youko." He looked to the fire demon, who nodded.

"I don't know what to say." Shuiichi said, picking up a leaf and twirling it.

"I will tell you now that Youko wants to kill you and take control for good." Hiei said.

"I thought you said he could not do that because he would die." Shuiichi said, his eyes going wide.

Hiei answered softly. "He seems to think he can do it. I don't know if it was a threat in hopes that we would back off, or if he honestly thinks he can survive without you."

"What do I need to do?" Shuiichi said, his green eyes making direct contact with crimson.

"You need to mentally go into Youko's room and become one with his spirit." Hiei said standing.

"I…can…n't." Shuiichi also went to stand, but he knelt back down as the world began to spin.

"What's wrong?" Hiei said, quickly going over and knelling next to the boy.

"My head hurts…I." Shuiichi tried to say, but let out a moan before a scream pierced the air, making the birds take flight, the trees rustling at the vibration.

Hiei watched as a white mist formed and then Youko stood up, his glare causing Hiei to fear for his life as he tried to back away.

"Now that Kurama is gone, the boy can not stop me from coming out." He smirked.

"He will beat you." Hiei said, drawing his sword.

"Oh, I do not think so." Youko smirked while reaching into his hair and pulling out a rose.

"You can't kill him." Hiei said, taking a defensive stance.

"Why not, I am stronger than him and can now keep my true form." Youko said then called his whip.

"You can not keep it when you sleep, thus you will die as well." Hiei stated as he started moving around the fox, still keeping his distance.

"That is only a small problem, if he is gone, I will be able to be out all the time." Youko said, turning with the smaller figure, keeping him in his sight.

"Are you willing to take that risk?" Hiei asked.

"You have already said you do not care for me." Youko said with some hurt in his voice. "Kurama is gone and you have no reason to love the ningen boy. Maybe I will end my life and put an end to it all." He said.

"You are too vain for that, you are still greedy." Hiei said, stopping. "You took over the body of a fetus to survive, what makes you think I'll believe you now."

"No flower of fortune has blessed a life resembling a long-buried tree – yet how bitter is the thought that all should end like this." Youko said, looking up at the setting sun.

"What the hell you babbling about?" Hiei growled, he made to strike and only hit air as the fox jumped back at the last second.

"Why did I seek to make it longer – this life that brings only pain?" Youko said softly as he jumped back.

"What are you talking about?" Hiei growled again, he was getting very angry, his energy flaring.

"You asked me once if Kurama ever taught me anything.'Patience'…that is what he taught me." The spirit yoko said softly, looking at the ground in sadness. "All those years being cooped up, nothing to do, not being able to show my true self and always having to do his bidding. Is that a life I wanted?" He smirked. "No, it was not. I wanted to be reborn and go back to the Makai, but it was not meant to be. Now that I think about it, there is nothing to go back to the Makai for. Kuronue is gone…he was the only one I lived for." He muttered.

"Like I believe you cared for him." Hiei spat.

"I came to care for him deeply." Youko said, his gold eyes looking at the fire demon. "As I told you. He was the only one to mount me. I have come to care for you as well. I let you mount me, and that, you should consider an honor." He said, striking with his whip, which Hiei dodged and tried to cut, but couldn't.

"I consider it an honor with Kurama, not you." Hiei stated and went to strike, but faked a swing with his sword as Youko went to block it. He struck with the hilt and hit the fox in the mid section.

Letting out an 'oof' as the air left his lungs, Youko staggered back and crouched down, breathing heavily. Hiei backed off and held his stance.

The yoko pounced and landed on the fire demon, pinning him. Hiei struggled and tried to get his sword between them, but Youko held and because of his larger body was able to stop any struggle.

"Tell me, little one, can he give you what I have been able to?" He purred, licking the smaller figure's neck and face.

"Stop it…get off." Hiei warned and tried to push again, to no avail.

Youko tore clothes and had all but Hiei's shorts off, when the fire demon started raising his energy, making it hot.

"Damn you." Youko growled, pushing away as he was burned on his hands and arms.

"I told you to get off." Hiei growled, getting up and grabbing his cloak to throw over his bare frame.

He turned to see Youko crouched in a ball on the ground, holding his arms and whimpering. The fire demon brought his sword up and held it to the fox's neck.

"I should kill you for that little trick you pulled with Yukina." He said, holding the blade at an angle so he could nick the skin.

"Did she reject you?" Youko said softly, then his voice started chuckling and he said. "Did she do what you always feared...tell you she will not have the forbidden one as her brother and wish that it was anyone else but you." He ended in an all out laughing fit, not even looking up at the fire demon for his reaction.

Hiei went to raise the sword, but stopped dead when he saw green in the golden eyes.

"Kurama?" He whispered, hesitating.

"Do it…please…just kill me." The red head pleaded. "I do not want to have to fight him anymore." He whimpered as tears formed in the corners of his eyes.

"I can't do that." Hiei muttered, dropping his sword and falling to his knees in front of the fox.

"Why, I never expected you to accept me…I." Hiei cut him off.

"Kurama…look at me." He said softly and waited until the mixed eyes looked at him before continuing. "I will only ever tell you this. Meeting you has changed my life. You have opened my eyes to so many things, including understanding my emotions. I realize now, that I can't change my past. You taught me that. So now I want a future and I want that with you Kurama, ningen emotions and all." He said, sitting back on his rear.

"I can give you all you need if you stay with me." Youko's voice broke through.

"I don't want you Youko. I do not care for you. I'm no longer like that, I've changed." Hiei said.

"I see…well then I guess there is truly nothing left for me." Youko said and his eyes rolled as he slumped over.

"Kurama!" Hiei yelled, running over and pulling the figure into his arms. He started shaking the limp form and running his hands through the fox's hair.

Panic sat in, the fox was breathing, but showing no signs of awareness. Taking the cover off his jagan, Hiei closed his eyes and plunged into the fox's mind.

A scream echoed over the forest, causing the three figures sitting inside the temple to run to the source. When they located the source, they saw two figures huddle together, laying slumped on the ground.

"What happened?" Yusuke asked as he went over to check on them, noticing the red head was back and Hiei had his hand in his hair.

"That was Hiei who screamed." Kuwabara said, also coming over to check.

Genkai noticed the cover was gone from Hiei's jagan. "Hiei must have tried to read the fox's mind." She said.

"What?" Yusuke looked over the fire demon.

"Let's get them back to the temple." She said.

Yusuke picked up the red head, while Kuwabara picked up the fire demon and they headed back to the temple.

a)a)a)a

Hiei's head was swimming with images. Images of his time with Kurama and he realized these scenes were from the red head's point of view. He saw scenes from the time they met, to the dark tournament, then onto Sensui and Yomi. He felt everything the fox felt in all those situation. Fear, anger, sadness, love, happiness, it was to much for him to process and he tried to clear his mind. Though he felt these emotions, he noticed that they never showed on the red head's face, he had kept them lock inside, afraid to show them for fear that something would be said.

The others watched as Hiei began to moan and shake his head. A single tear went down the side of his cheek, turning into a white gem as it hit the floor.

"He can cry tear gems?" Kuwabara whispered, as Yukina reached over and picked it up.

"Yes, he is koorime, but look here." She said and held the pearl up to the light, showing a black spot in the middle. "His are not as pure as mine. His will have flaws, because of his other half." She told him.

Genkai saw red eyes open and take in their surroundings. They landed on her. "Welcome back. That was a stupid thing you did." She said, watching as the small demon sat up and grab his head.

"Where's….." Hiei said, but was cut off.

"Look beside you." She said.

Hiei looked to the figure beside him and let out an emotional sigh.

"He's alive, we just need to wait and see if his mind's intact." Genkai said and got up to leave. "Come you all. Let them rest."

"What about…" Yusuke said getting up.

"All we have is time." She said, holding the door for the others.

Hiei watched them leave and as soon as the door closed, he scooped the red head up in his arms and held him in a death grip. Taking a hand, he started running it through the red….wait…it was blood, lush, but with streaks of silver highlights…is this Kurama. 'What the hell is going on in that head of yours, fox.' He thought, pulling the figure even closer and placing his head on the other's shoulder. Closing his eyes, he for the first time, that he could remember, began to pray.

a)a)a)a

Sometime later the door slid open and Yukina came in with a tray of food.

"I thought you might be hungry, any change." She said as she placed the tray on the floor and went to her knees to serve the tea.

"No change." Hiei said as he watched her. He was still holding the red head and wasn't going to let him go until he woke.

"May I say something?" Yukina said, not looking up as she placed food on a plate.

When she didn't get an answer she looked up and continued.

"I am so happy that you are my brother. I should have realized it, the signs were obvious." She said softly, placing her hands on her knees and waiting.

"What makes you say that?" Hiei said.

"I hear more than people realize, talk about the forbidden one, how no one would want him as a brother. I just didn't realize all the talk was about you." She said, looking down. He watched as her hand went to the necklace, fingering it.

"I'm sorry, this is yours." She suddenly said, removing the necklace and holding it out.

Hiei held up a hand. "No, you keep it…I have no use for it." He said, but then saw the sadness on her face. "Please keep it for me, I would feel honored if you held onto it." He said.

"Then you must keep mine and wear it close to your heart." She said and got up to leave.

"Yukina." He said, stopping her at the door. "When this is over…I would…." He paused. 'Damn these emotions.'

"Yes." She turned.

"The wedding…I would like to hear what you have planned for the wedding." He basically spilled the sentence out.

"Yes, of course." She said and left with a smile on her face, leaving him holding the red head.

End Chapter 12

Lyrics to the song: _**Figure.09**_ – by: _Linkin Park _

Nothing ever stops all these thoughts and the pain attached to them. Sometimes I wonder why this is happening. It's like nothing I can do would distract me when I think of how I shot myself in the back again. Cause from the infinite words I can say I put all you gave to me on display, but didn't realize instead of setting it free I took what I hated and made it a part of me.

(Never goes away…never goes away)

(Course)

And now you've become a part of me…you'll always be right here…you've become a part of me…you'll always be my fear…I can't separate…myself from what I've done…giving up a part of me…I've let myself become you.

Hearing your name the memories come back again. I remember when it started happening. I see you n' every thought I had and then the thoughts slowly found words attached to them and I knew as they escaped away. I was committing myself to em' n' everyday. I regret saying those things cause now I see that I took what I hated and made it a part of me.

(Get away from me) Give me my space back you gotta just (go) Everything comes down the memories of (you) I kept it in without letting you (know) I let you go so get away from (me) Everything comes down to the memories of (you) I kept it in without letting you (know) I let you go.


	14. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

_Where is this fog coming from, nothing but fog for as far as the eye can see. Wait, what is this? I have a conscious thought. Does this mean I am alive? Yet, I can not feel my body…is this what death is then? I am confused… nothing making sense, why can I not remember anything? Okay, let us start with something simple. Name…that is a good place to start…think…what was the last thing you remembered…what was it? Someone yelled something…think…something like…Kur…Kurama. Was that it? It sounds like it could be a name, is that my name? Who said it and why? My head hurts…well that means I have a head, right. Think, I need to think, now what was the last thing you remember, the last thing you did? A short black haired person standing in front of me, who is this, is he friend or foe. Ha…the fog is clearing, now maybe things will come into focus. A hallway, why am I standing in a hallway? Where do these doors lead? Well, may as well try this one. What is this, ah yes, arms and legs, well now, I do now feel whole in a way. Let us see what is behind door number one, shall we. Who is this…a boy… a red headed boy? Why does he look familiar and why do I feel like I need to know who he is. _

"_It is about time you came in?" The boy said._

"_What do you mean, do I know you?"_

"_I have many things to show you and after I do, I want you to go to the other door and see the person behind it."_

"_Uh…what do you have to show me?_

"_Come." The red head motioned for him to come over and sit in front of him._

"_Now see what all we have been through." The red head said and placed his hands on either side of my head. I screamed. Flashes of memory…is this my life…'flashing before my eyes?' _

"_We will become one"_

a)a)a)a

Hiei jerked awake. 'Damn it, I feel asleep…idiot.' He cursed himself, looking out the window at the full moon with thoughts and emotions filling his mind. Youko would have been out tonight. He was such a fool, he should've known something wasn't right when Youko didn't remember conversations and things he had done with Kurama. Had he been trying to ignore it, thinking the fox was teasing him. He admits to being sexually distracted with the silver yoko, but he thought he was helping Kurama deal with his demon and ningen sides. Kurama always stopped himself when it came to him having anything to do with his demon side, always letting his ningen side stop him. Hiei had wanted him to accept his demon side. Nothing mattered now, he could think about everything that happened and everything he did wrong for the rest of his life. It would not make up for what he did and what happened. The main thing now was to get the red head in his arms to wake up and to wake up normal. Hell, if Kurama woke up and decided he didn't want a relationship or even a friendship with him because of what he'd done, well then fine, he could live with that. It would break him, but he could go back and take over his duties for Mukuro and move on, knowing the red head was alive and hopefully happy.

Hiei readjusted the limp body in his arms. He had moved to the wall next to the window, placing the red head between his legs, leaning against his chest. The others had come in and out almost all night, each telling him to go and take a break. He declined, but ate the food that was brought and even got Kurama to take a sip of broth, but he'd not let go, only long enough to remove his cloak and move to the window.

He looked to the red head when he felt him move. Hope crossed his face as he watched the red head move his head back and forth. "Kurama, come on now, time to wake up." He said softly, running his hand through the red, silver highlighted hair.

Kurama gasped and his eyes shot open. He went to sit up, but Hiei held him, brushing his hair and reassuring him.

_Have I been captured? Why can I not move? Who has me and why? My head… Am I being tortured? _

"_You can not wake yet, you must go to the other room." He heard a voice. Then everything went blank._

Kurama's form went limp and Hiei sighed. 'Well, that was something at least.' He thought, kissing the top of the red head's head before going back to looking out the window.

Dawn rose to find them in the same position. Hiei had refused to fall back asleep incase Kurama showed signs of waking again, but there had been nothing.

Yusuke had come in and told him that he needed to leave. He'd been away from Keiko to long and needed to get back to the restaurant. Hiei understood and agreed to have the raven haired notified if there was any change. Kuwabara came in awhile later and said he had to go and get some homework done for class and that he would stop by soon. Again the fire demon said he understood and would inform him of any change.

Yukina came in with breakfast and finally convinced him to go and get cleaned up. He was tired and would not argue with his sister, so he reluctantly went to take a shower and get some air, on the condition that she came and got him if there was even a hint of movement from the red head.

a)a)a)a

_The hallway again…what did the voice say…ah yes, I needed to go into the other door. The one door is gone, just a blank wall now. Let's see what is behind door number two. _

_Opening the door there is a form laying on a bear skin rug. This form has silver hair, furry ears and a…tail? Why do I feel like I should know this person as well? Like the other one, I feel a connection, but why._

"_You came." The silver yoko said._

"_I was told to."_

"_I no longer wish to live this life. Come…I will give you all I can. I will not be able to give you all my powers, but enough to do what you need. Enjoy my memories and always remember where you came from and how you came to be."_

_I move to sit in front of him and he places his hands on either sides of my face. Long forgotten images, powers, people, knowledge from thousands of years flood my mind. Too much, can not process it… Help…me…help…me…HIEI!" That name…they will help me with this…HIEI…can he hear me…can he see me…I open my mouth and try to scream_.

"HIEI!"

He heard his name echo across the porch. Running back inside, he ran to the room and saw the red head sitting up, clutching his head, his eyes wide with fear. Yukina was sitting back, looking like she'd been bitten.

"What happened?" He growled. Seeing the fear in his sister's face, he tried to stay calm as he made his way over and tried to comfort the fox.

"I was just wiping the sweat off his face and neck. He moaned and whispered your name, but then he just sat up and screamed." She said, regaining her composer and scooting back.

"Sorry." He whispered and gave her a glance, she nodded.

"I'll go get Genkai." She said and quickly hurried out.

"Kurama, can you hear me?" Hiei asked, pulling the red head's hands away for his head so he could look at the man's face, trying to see any signs of awareness.

'What the hell?' Hiei thought. His eyes, they're the bright green he's use to seeing, but there was now gold in them, a dark gold circle, like someone had taken a marker and drew a neat circle, just around the irises. This and the silver highlights in the hair, if this was permanent, then they were going to take some getting use to.

The eyes looked to him and the fear that was in them, made the fire demon's heart sink.

He went to hold the red head and found the body stiff and unmoving.

Genkai came rushing in, Yukina right behind her. "What happened?"

They each told her what had happened and when.

"Hiei, I think now would be a good time to try and read his mind." She said.

"What?" He looked to her.

"He's stuck…you need to bring him back. Think of him as being locked in a room. He needs someone to open the door and guide him out. You are the one who can do that. He called for you, so he trusts you." Genkai said.

"Okay, okay…I get it." Hiei said, removing the ward over his jagan and sitting in front of Kurama. His eye glowed and he closed his others before placing his hands on either side of red head's face.

Kurama jerked and tried to pull back, but Genkai had moved behind him to stop him from moving.

"_Kurama, Kurama can you hear me?" Hiei said, finding himself standing in a hallway of some sort. Wait, wasn't this what Yusuke said, what Kurama said his mind was like. He didn't see any doors though. Making his way down the hall, he saw a form sitting with his knees pulled up to his chest, his head was down and was that…crying… he heard._

"_Kurama." He said again as he knelt down and waited for the figure to look at him._

_Those green, with gold trim, eyes looked up at him, they were red and swollen from crying._

"_Hiei?" The voice was soft and he coughed as a sop escaped his lips._

"_Let's get out of here." Hiei said, holding out his hand for the red head to take._

"_We can't." Kurama said._

"_Why?" Hiei wondered, leaving is hand out and motioning for him to take it._

"_There are no doors and no exit." The voice was still soft and sad._

"_I know a way out." Hiei said again motioning for his hand to be taken._

"_Okay." Kurama muttered, taking the offered hand and standing. Together they walked back the way Hiei had come._

Hiei's eyes opened and his jagan closed, his head swayed as the room came back into focus. He still had his hands on either side of Kurama's face and he looked to see the mixed eyes looking at him.

"Kurama?"

"Hiei."

"Welcome back."

"What happened?"

"Long story, how do you feel?

"Confused."

"Well, that's a start." Hiei said removing his hands and letting a soft smile come to his face.

"We have a lot of talking to do, but first you need to eat." Genkai told them and nodded to Yukina, who took the tray and left. After a few minutes she came back with some more food. Kurama ate in silence and felt everyone's eyes on him as he finished.

"Now it's time to talk." Genkai said. "How do you feel?"

"I…I feel fine, tired and really confused, but fine." He said.

"Can you talk to Shuiichi or Youko?" She asked, watching his facial expressions.

Kurama closed his eyes then gasped. "There is…there is no doors, what…where are they?" His voice started rising with fear, his eyes opening wide in shock.

"Calm." Genkai said. "You merged with them and now you are Kurama."

"What." Kurama whispered, his hand going to his chest, it hurt. 'What the hell.'

"I know this is confusing, but think, what memories do you have?" She said, keeping her voice calm and reassuring.

"I remember everything, nothing has changed." The red head said. "They are just no longer there." He then said softly, looking to the floor and feeling alone. He was so use to having their voices in his head, now there was only silence.

"Get some rest and try not to get to upset." She said. "Hiei can fill you in on things, but rest. I'm going to do some more research, Hiei." She waited until he looked at her. "I'll let the others know he's awake. Don't pressure him. He's going to be confused for awhile. Have patience." With that, she got up and followed Yukina out the door.

Hiei glared at her as she made her remarks, but didn't say anything. When she left, he moved over to hold Kurama and was caught off guard when the red head pulled away.

"What are you doing?" Kurama asked as he pulled away.

"I wanted to hold you." He said.

"You do not care for that." Kurama said.

"I don't mind." Hiei shrugged.

"You do not have to do something just to please me." The red head stated firmly.

"I'm not doing it to please you." Hiei voice growled. "I'm starting to like it." He whispered.

"Really?" The red head's eyebrows went up.

"Really, now come here." Hiei said opening his arms. Kurama fell into them and the red head sighed, wrapping his arms around the smaller figure then smiled into the fire demon's chest as he felt his hair being brushed. Sleep soon claimed him.

End Chapter 13

Lyrics to the song: _**Numb**_ – by: _Linkin Park_

I'm tired of being what you want me to be. Feeling so faithless lost under the surface. Don't know what you're expecting of me. Put under the pressure, of walking in your shoes. (caught under the undertow, just caught under the undertow) Every step I take is another mistake to you.

(Course)

I've become so numb I can't feel you there. I've become so tired, so much more aware. I've becoming this all I want to do. Is be more like me and be less like you.

Can't you see that you're smothering me. Holding too tightly, afraid to lose control. Cause everything that you thought I would be, has fallen apart right in front of you. (caught under the undertow, just caught under the undertow) Every step that I take is another mistake to you (caught under the undertow, just caught under the undertow) and every second I waste is more than I can take.

And I know…I may end up falling…but I know…you were just like me with someone disappointed in you.

I've become so numb, I can't feel you there. Is everything what you want me to be.


	15. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Hiei opened his eyes to an empty futon, apparently he'd fallen asleep as well. Looking around he didn't get a chance to ponder where the red head could have gone, as he heard a crash from down the hall.

In a flash he was standing outside the bathroom, behind Genkai, who had managed to beat him there.

"What's wrong?" He asked as he tried to see around the master.

"It would seem he just got his first look in the mirror." She said, shaking her head. She hadn't warned him of his appearance and she was guessing Hiei hadn't either, because when she had shown up, Kurama was sitting on the side of the wooden tub holding his chest and his eyes had been as wide as saucers.

Kurama looked at them when he heard them talking and let his body relax. "It would seem I have some explaining to okasan to do." He said softly, forcing a soft smile.

"I'll get Yukina and we'll clean up the mess, don't worry about it." Genkai said and walked away, finally allowing Hiei to get into the small space.

The bathroom at one time had been quite spacious, because it had only consisted of a large wooden tub, but many years ago, Genkai had had modern plumping installed. Now the space had a toilet, a pedestal sink, with mirror, and a small one person shower stall, making it a tight fit. The crashing Hiei had heard had been a free standing shelving unit that held the bathroom necessities. Kurama had apparently shocked himself when he looked into the mirror, causing him to step back and knock over the unit, spilling its contents all over the floor.

Hiei made his way over and looked at the red head. Taking in his appearance, he realized Kurama had come to get cleaned up, because he only had his underwear on and a clean towel was draped over the toilet seat.

"You okay?" He asked.

"Just a little surprised is all." Kurama said, trying to chuckle, but failing.

"I kind of like it myself." Hiei said softly, lifting a hand and fingering one of the silver streaks.

"Hmm." Kurama closed his eyes and leaned into the touch.

Hiei smirked and began massaging the red head's scalp. After only a moment though, Kurama got his composure back and stood up.

"I could not sleep anymore and wanted to take a shower, sorry to wake you." He said, turning on the shower.

"It's okay." Hiei shrugged. "Would you like some company in the shower?"

"Don't you think it would be a little crowded?" Kurama said jokingly.

"I don't mind being plastered up against you." Hiei said, standing in front of the taller figure and wrapping his arms around him.

"I…." Kurama went say while his hands went to remove the arms holding him. He seemed to be a little uncomfortable and nervous.

"What's wrong?" Hiei said, pulling back.

"I…I just do not feel right." Kurama finally said and stepped back. Turning his back to the shorter figure, he took off his shorts before getting into the shower and pulling the curtain, separating them.

"I'll go." Hiei said with hurt in his voice.

"Hiei." He heard as he went to leave.

"Yes."

"I just need a little time." The voice sounded tired.

Hiei gave a nod and left, sliding the door close behind him.

a)a)a)a

As Hiei walked out into a clearing, he saw Yukina taking laundry off the line and went over to her.

"Brother." She said as she turned and saw him, but upon seeing his look, she said. "I'm sorry…I should not call you that." She said in apology and went back to pulling clothes off the line.

"Hmm...What?" Hiei said, coming out of his daze.

"You do not wish to be called brother." Yukina said, not turning to see the shocked look on his face.

"Yukina." He tried to think of something to say, but he just stood there.

She turned, holding a large sheet and said. "Could you please help me with this?" Without waiting for an answer, she placed one end in his hands and walked backed.

"I didn't think you cared for me." He said softly as he helped fold the sheet.

"You are being silly." She said with a smile as she walked back towards him and took the sheet, folding it in half and then placing it in the basket.

"I'm not 'silly.'" Hiei growled.

"I care for all my friends, they are all special to me and now it's even more special knowing one of them is my brother." She said, continuing to take towels down and fold them before placing them in the basket.

Thinking of the comment Kurama had made to him. Hiei walked over and took Yukina's hands into his. "Yukina." He waited until she looked at him. "I just need a little time." He said, but added. "I had my reasons and some day I'll tell them to you, but for now, I would be honored if you called me brother."

She smiled the biggest smile he had ever seen. He smiled as well and they hugged each other.

"Oh thank you…brother." She said pulling back.

"I need to go and think, if you will excuse me." Hiei said and went to turn.

"Wait." She called out, her hand going into her pocket.

"Yes." He stopped and waited.

"This is yours...maybe you can give it to someone special." She said, placing an object in his hand.

Hiei opened his hand and saw a tear gem.

"Who made you cry?" He growled and was ready to beat someone for making his sister cry.

She smiled. "You're being silly again." He teased.

He growled again.

"It's yours." She said with a giggle at the way he was acting.

"What?"

"You shed that right before you woke up, from when you tried to read Kurama's mind." She told him.

He held the gem, rolling it in his hand, thinking he'd never cried before, maybe when he was a baby, but he never remembered crying. "It looks a lot like yours." He said, holding it up.

"Yes, but look here." She said and placed her small hand on his to move it to the light of the sun. "See the middle, where it is dark, yours has a flaw, that's how they are different. Though you think you have a dark heart, you are pure in heart and soul, only dark with your fire." She commented and let go of his hand with a smile as he looked.

"I think I know who I would like to give this too." He said.

She nodded, having her own idea who the lucky person would be.

"Could you do me a favor?" He asked.

"Of course, brother." She smiled and nodded as he told her what he wanted.

a)a)a)a

Kurama picked up the last bottle and placed it on the self. He knew Genkai had told him to leave it, but it was his mess and neither she nor Yukina should have to clean up after him.

Standing up, he looked again in the mirror. It was going to take some getting use to and how was he going to explain it to his family. He didn't care for his 'friends', his true friends where part of his family and they knew who and what he was. All the 'friends' he knew at work and the few he saw from his school days, he could care less about.

Sighing, he began to brush his hair and he fingered the silver highlights, taking in the texture and feel. It was the same as his red parts, just silver. It didn't look bad, just different. After a good brush, he looked closely at his eyes, seeing the gold ring. Now that might be something people wouldn't notice unless they stared at him directly.

He sighed again and headed back to his room and was surprised to see Genkai standing at his door.

"When you're dressed, I want to talk." She said, stepping aside to allow him access.

He nodded and headed in, after a few minutes he opened the door, letting her know he was dressed.

She took a seat on the futon and motioned for him to sit as well.

Following her silent order, he sat.

"I know this is hard, I could not even take a guess as to what you are thinking or feeling." She said then held up a hand to stop him from speaking. "You said you remember everything, are they separate?" She asked.

Kurama nodded, saying. "I have both sets of memories, plus my own."

"Are you having problems sorting them?" She wondered.

"Yes." The red head nodded. "Every time I even have a thought, one or both of their memories comes to mind and I have to separate them and figure out why I am thinking of them." Seeing her look, he added. "Sorry, that might not make sense."

She nodded, thinking. "I think you should ask Hiei for help." She finally said.

"Why." Kurama was taken aback by the suggestion.

"He can use his jagan to help you sort and control the memories." She said.

"I do not think he would want to see my memories." Kurama tried to joke.

"Do you not trust him?" She asked shrugging.

"Why would you ask that?" He said his eyes going wide.

"Because maybe you're blaming him for making you this way." She said, looking straight at him.

"I…" Kurama's mouth opened and closed a few times. 'What could he say to that?' Maybe deep down, he was blaming the fire demon. He was the one who wanted to spend time with Youko and now that he had those memories and knew what they had been doing.

"I think you need to hear Hiei's point of view." She broke his thoughts. Standing and going to the door, she paused and said lightly. "And it could be worse." She waited until he looked at her. "You could have fox ears and a tail." She left, leaving him sitting there, looking dumbfounded.

a)a)a)a

Hiei let his sword fall and cursed himself. He thought getting in some practice would help him think, instead, it only added to his frustration because his mind kept playing his memories of his sparring with Kurama and Youko.

He had only been trying to help the red head. He didn't know what the others thought, he didn't really care, but he was only trying to help, 'damn it' and he had to make the red head believe him. 'How' was the only question? The gift he was having Yukina take care of was a start. Kurama would have to understand that it was shed for him, but he needed words and he was not good with words, maybe some action. He could ask Yusuke for some advice.

Leaning against a tree, he was completely lost in thought and did not hear someone approach.

"Getting distracted can get you killed."

Hiei moved in a flash and had his sword at the ready, but lowered it as he took in the sight of the red head.

"Don't do that again." Hiei growled.

"Sorry." Kurama said, turning to leave.

"Wait…you know that is not what I meant." Hiei said softly, holding out his hand in a gesture for him to stay.

Kurama just stood there, thinking about Genkai's comment about asking for the fire demon's help.

"You want to spar?" Hiei asked.

Taking a moment to think, he said. "Sure." Kurama reached into his hair and pulled out a rose. He looked at it and it seemed to be the same as all the others he had used.

Hiei raised his sword and waited, he was going to let the red head take the lead and set the pace.

"Rose-whip." Kurama called and moved in.

After a lot of give and take on both sides, they had worked up a light sweat. Hiei had to keep stopping himself from pushing the fox to hard. He let the red head strike more and tried to ease his strikes back, giving him time to block them.

"Is there a problem?" Kurama asked as he easily blocked a strike that even Kuwabara would have seen coming from a mile away.

"No." Hiei said and jumped back to miss a hit from the whip.

"Then why are you being soft on me. Or do you still think I am weak?" Kurama's voice was strong and the fire demon saw the anger flash in the green/gold eyes.

"No!" Hiei flared his energy. "I do not think you are weak. I was letting you set the pace."

"Oh, okay then." Kurama said, returning the rose to his hair and pulling out a seed. He grew it into his grass sword and immediately attacked, taking the smaller demon off guard and knocking him to the ground.

They fought like their lives depended on it. Kurama managed to get in some good hits and even made a few cuts on Hiei's torso with his sword. Hiei had made his own marks as he cut Kurama's arm and upper leg. None of the wounds were life threatening, but they still bleed and hurt.

Give and take was the game, each time one made a mark the other managed to return the gesture. Finally, after a few mess ups, Hiei managed to corner Kurama and placed his sword at the red head's neck.

"You trying to get yourself killed?" Hiei said, breathing heavily as he stood there taking in the sight of the fox.

Kurama's eyes went wide as an image of Hiei's sword at his neck came to mind. It was not his image, but Youko's. _"I should kill you for that little trick you pulled with Yukina."_ He heard and looked to the crimson eyes with fear.

Hiei lowered his sword and looked at the fear and confusion in the green/gold eyes.

"You alright?" He asked.

"So sorry?" Kurama whispered and coughed as he choked back a sob.

"What?" Hiei's eyebrows went up. He sat down next to the red head and pulled him into an embrace. "Why are you sorry?" He whispered.

"You should have killed me when you had the chance." Kurama said, trying to pull back, but the smaller demon was holding on and wouldn't let go.

"What are you talking about?" Hiei asked again trying to keep the anger out of his voice.

"I broke your trust. You have every right to kill me." Kurama said softly, giving up his struggle and collapsing in the arms.

End Chapter 14

Lyrics to the song: _**Down with the Sickness**_ – by: _Disturbed_

Drowning deep in my sea of loathing…Broken you servant I kneel (will you give it to me) It seems what's left of my human side is slowly changing in me (will you give it to me)

Looking at my own reflection…when suddenly it changes…violently it changes (oh no) there is no turning back now…you've woken up the demon in me

(Course)

Get up, come on get down with the sickness. Open up your hate and let it flow into me. Get up, come on get down with the sickness. You mother get up come on get down with the sickness. You f...ker get up come on get down with the sickness. Madness is the gift that has been given to me.

I can see inside you, the sickness is rising…don't try to deny what you feel (will you give it to me) it seems that all that was good has died and is decaying in me.

It seems you're having some trouble…in dealing with these changes…living with these changes (oh no) the world is a scary place…now that you've woken up the demon in me.

Madness has now come over me


	16. Chapter 15 part 1

This chapter is rated **M**

Chapter 15 (part 1)

"I broke your trust. You have every right to kill me." Kurama said softly, giving up his struggle and collapsing in the arms.

"What are you talking about?" Hiei said, pushing the red head up out of his arms so he could get a look at his face. The face was wet with tears and there was still fear in the green/gold orbs.

"Yu…ki..na." Kurama choked out. He was trying to control his shaking, but was only making it worse and he turned his head away. "You did not want her to know and….." He said softly.

"You did nothing wrong." Hiei spoke softly as well as he explained. "It was Youko… not you." He pulled the red head's head to him and kissed the top of it.

"I am Youko." Kurama whispered.

"No…you're not." The fire demon said with a shake of his head. "You are Kurama and you are a completely different person than that ruthless, uncaring, selfish bastard of a yoko." He stated and began kissing the red head again, this time placing them on his head before moving to the cheeks and placing one on each closed eye. When Kurama's eyes closed to the kisses, Hiei licked the tears that still leaked from the corners. The red head moaned, relaxing into the hands on either side of his face.

Taking that as a sign, Hiei placed a soft kiss on the pale lips. When Kurama didn't move, he kissed again, this time a little harder. Kurama stiffened, but did not open his eyes or move from the hold. He did however let out a soft gasp, followed by another moan.

Hiei pushed the red head back until they were laying on the ground. Kurama still didn't open his eyes as he allowed Hiei to move him and continue the kissing.

Hiei ravished the figure under him as he kissed, licked and nipped at the exposed parts. The more Kurama moaned and squirmed the more turned on he was getting. He removed what was left of the red head's shirt and licked at the cuts he'd made on the soft pale flesh. He wasn't sorry for the marks, they had sparred like that many times, the 'give and take game' they called it.

He attacked the nipples and was rewarded with a gasp as the red head arched his back into the torture, his hands digging into the ground, trying to find support.

Hiei moved on and slid Kurama's pants down, taking the shorts with them. He was surprise to see the red head hard and ready, and looking back up at the closed eyes, he thought. 'Does he really want this right now?' Green eyes opened to look at him as if hearing the thought.

"Kurama, are you sure about this?" He asked when he saw the lust in the green/gold eyes.

Kurama's answer was a nod, followed by him spreading his legs in an open invitation.

Hiei growled at the site. Lowering his head, he took the erection in his mouth, getting a gasp from the red head, who arched his back before sitting up some and placing his hand in the soft black hair. Kurama barely heard the thought in his head.

"_I'll stop at any time. I don't want to hurt you." _He heard.

Kurama answered by taking the black haired's head and pushing it down, making the fire demon take all of him in his mouth. Hiei complied and picked up his pace. Bobbing up and down until he felt the fox tense followed by the feel of hot liquid against the back of his throat.

Licking up the mess, Hiei looked to see Kurama laying blissfully with his eyes closed and a light sweat was glistening his skin.

"May I continue?" Hiei asked and received a nod. Wetting his fingers with spit and some of the red head's cum. He placed a finger, then two, moving them until he felt the body was ready. Positioning himself at the tight hole, he slowly sheathed, watching the whole time for any signs of discomfort. When he was completely in, Kurama moved his legs, wrapping them around the smaller figure and using them to guide the fire demon's pace.

They rode the waves, bringing the fire demon to release, tensing and growling as his seed coated the walls of the fox.

Hiei collapsed and gulped for air, trying to get his body to calm after the rush. He turned to Kurama and saw something that made his cooling skin crawl. The gold in Kurama's eyes was glowing and he had the look of cat who just found a rat caught in a trap and wanted to play.

Kurama laughed and rolled over, pinning the smaller figure under him while grabbing Hiei's wrists and pinning them above his head.

Kurama kissed the red lips, saying. "Are you ready to play my way now?" The voice held a tinge of mischief and cockiness.

Hiei could only gulp as his body was attacked.

End Chapter 15 (part 1)


	17. Chapter 15 part 2

Chapter 15 (part 2)

Kurama kissed the red lips and said. "Are you ready to play my way now?" The voice held a tinge of mischief and cockiness.

Hiei could only gulp as his body was attacked.

Hiei had only lowered his pants enough to expose himself and he felt the pull as they were torn the rest of the way off.

"Kurama?" He said as his body jerked from the pull.

"Shhh." Kurama placed a hand on his mouth, quieting him.

Hiei's eyes went wide as he felt his member taken and roughly stroked. "Do you like this my little fire." Kurama purred next to his ear.

Panic sat in. 'This is not Kurama's way.' Hiei thought and started pushing on the taller figure.

"Easy, little one…is this not what you wanted." Kurama purred and started kissing his face and neck.

Trying to control his emotions, for yes in a way he did like it, it was however, not Kurama's way and he was going to make sure the red head knew what he was doing before he regretted it.

Continuing to struggle only caused him to be restrained more. "Well, it would seem you want to try and fight me." He heard Kurama say, before a vine snaked its way around his wrists, pulling them together in a tight hold above his head.

He had no choice, raising his body temperature. He waited until Kurama leaned away enough so as not to burn his face before letting loose a short burst of heat.

Kurama yelped jumping back, his hands and lower arms red. A shocked, confused look covered his face.

When the weight left him, Hiei burned the vines and sat up. Rubbing his wrists, he studied the red head.

Kurama's lips trembled and he shrunk back, hugging himself as tears threatened to fall again.

"Kurama." He said softly, he didn't know what to say.

"You do not want me." Kurama whispered.

"NO." He said with anger and then cursed himself as the red head trembled. "No, I mean yes…I do want you…this…" Hiei indicated what was left of the vines. "Is not you though." Trying to explain what he meant.

Recognition seem to come to the red head and he straightened up, looking to the fire demon.

"But I thought…Youko's memories…you…." Kurama stammered, starting to shake again.

Hiei sighed and scooted over. Getting ready to put his arms around the shaking figure, he was surprised when Kurama turned and fell into his chest.

"I am so confused." Kurama said softly, burying his head into the fire demon's chest.

Running his hand through the red/silver locks, Hiei held him and tried to sooth the taller figure. He didn't know what to say. So he only held, until Kurama was ready to do something.

"Genkai." Kurama muttered.

"What?" Hiei barely heard the name.

Leaning up so he could be heard, Kurama said again. "Genkai…she…she said I should ask you for help." He pulled out of Hiei's arms and sat back, wiping his face.

"Help with what?" Hiei asked, not wanting to let go, but allowing it.

"I can not control the memories and thoughts of Youko and Shuiichi. They are constantly running through my mind." Kurama said and looked to see confusion in the crimson eyes.

"I…m…sorry…it is too confusing." Kurama laughed, though it was forced.

"Let's go talk to Genkai." Hiei said retrieving his pants, there was just enough to cover him.

Kurama also got dressed and together they headed back to the temple.

When they got there, Yusuke and Kuwabara were making their way up the steps and they stopped when they saw the two demons heading up.

"Hey you two." Seeing the state they were in, Yusuke joked. "That must have been some sparring." He smiled as the two approached them.

Getting what had happened. Kuwabara got a disgusted look on his face. He didn't mind them being together, he just didn't want to know the details and see them.

"Move." Hiei growled as he led the red head pass them and up the stairs. Kurama had been leaning on him more and more as they got closer to the temple.

"Hey, is he alright?" Yusuke asked seeing the real shape the red head was in and the dazed look in the green eyes.

"He'll be fine." Hiei growled, not stopping.

"Can we help?" Kuwabara offered as he watched the red head stagger and almost fall.

"I've got him." Hiei said with anger, grabbing Kurama before he met the ground.

"Hiei." Yusuke said, going to his side and placing a hand on his shoulder, stopping him. He gave a nod to Kuwabara, who nodded back and picked up the red head.

"What….." Hiei was held back by Yusuke before he could stop the orange haired from continuing the trek up the stairs.

"Let us help." Yusuke said and turned the fire demon so they could climb the stairs.

"Get your hands off me." Hiei growled, shrugging the arms away and beginning to climb, leaving the raven haired to follow.

When Kuwabara walked in the door, Yukina and Genkai were at the table having tea.

"What happened?" Yukina said, getting up.

"I don't know, ask the shrimp." Kuwabara said as he followed the young maiden down the hall to the room Kurama had been staying in.

Placing the red head on the futon, Kuwabara moved away to allow Yukina to look him over.

"Where did these burns come from?" She asked as she began to heal them. They were only first degree burns, but they still probably hurt the boy.

Kuwabara only shrugged, he didn't know that either. Just as she finished healing the burns, the others made their way in.

Taking seats to make a circle around the red head, Hiei told them what happened. He didn't really want Yusuke and Kuwabara to hear it, but they were Kurama's friends, as well as his he supposed, and knew they only wanted to help.

"Kurama is having trouble identifying with himself." Genkai said after he was done.

"What do you mean?" Yusuke said. "He's Kurama and always has been."

"Yes, but he was the controller of Youko and Shuiichi. He is himself now and needs to make his own decisions and make his own choices." She said.

"You saying he didn't do that before." Kuwabara said.

"What I'm trying to say." She said. "Is that all the thoughts he had before, all the decisions and choices he made, were based off what was best for Youko and Shuiichi. What they wanted and needed. He didn't have to think or act for himself, he just did what was best for them, whether he liked it or not. He needs to block the other memories and make his own, he no longer has to worry about them." She finished, still seeing confusion in all their eyes.

"That's a mouth full." Yusuke said, rubbing his neck.

"He said you told him to ask for my help." Hiei said looking at the red head and running his fingers through his hair, he had sat at the red head's head.

The master nodded, saying. "I believe you can help him store the memories. Make them go away so he is not thinking about them all the time. Allowing him to remember when he needs to. He's going to have a hard time getting use to being just him, creating his own memories and making his own decisions, but I know with all of our help he will get through this." She paused, looking to each of them.

They all nodded in return.

"What can I do?" Hiei said.

"Just what I said, use your jagan, if you can, and help build walls in his mind, can you do that?" Genkai asked.

Hiei nodded and removed the ward over his jagan. Closing his eyes, he allowed the jagan to turn purple and placed his hands on either side of the red head's head.

Hiei gasped as Kurama's eyes shot open and they both screamed as their minds collided.

"_Get out of my head." Kurama yelled._

"_Why…I can help you." Hiei said._

"_I do not want you to see what I have done, all the terrible things and you hate my ningen side…I do not want you to hate me." Kurama said, mentally pushing the fire demon._

"_I don't hate you. Everything bad that was done was by Youko, not you. You need to let me lock those memories away. You no longer need to remember them and I could never hate you…I…I……love you Kurama…you the red head I came to know when I first met you…ningen emotions and all. Pl…please, let me do this for you." Hiei was trying to say what he felt. He hated his emotions. He was never good at expressing them._

_Kurama mentally backed off and let the fire demon build his walls._

"_I want you to sleep now, rest. Everything will be alright when you wake." Hiei said, pulling out of the red head's mind._

Hiei opened his eyes to see the others staring at him with concern. He placed the ward back over his jagan and said. "It's done, he'll sleep for awhile and then we'll see." He leaned forward as a dizzy spell washed over him, it always happened when he used his jagan to enter peoples minds.

Before he completely fell, Yusuke grabbed him and helped him lay next to Kurama. When he was settled, Yukina covered both of them with a blanket and they all left, allowing the two to rest.

End Chapter 15 (part 2)

Lyrics to the song: _**Tempt me (if you want to)**_ – by: _Vicki Thomas_

You've got a pretty face, yeah such a beautiful face. I could talk all night, baby, I could talk to you all night.

But what do I see there…are they symptoms of love. When you're staring straight at me and saying yes to anything I'm thinking of.

I've been hurt, I've been hurt before…So wait a minute darlin'…look into my eyes now…I can't take no more oh no…

(Course)

You can tempt me if you want to…you can try to tear my heart apart. Tempt me if you want to…it's getting harder and harder.

Oh you talk about freedom…like it's the greatest thing going. And a fever shakes my body as I think about spending one more night alone.

Well they took it all away and left me on my own just one day. And now I'm free to do all the things I never even care about anyways.

I've been hurt, kicked around before…So wait a minute darlin'…look into my eyes now… there's go to be something more oh yeah…

You can tempt me if you want to…you can try to tear my heart apart. Tempt me if you want to…it's getting harder and harder to hold on.

You can tempt me if you want to, you can try to kiss my fears away. Tempt me if you want to, it's getting harder and harder.

I see you standing there. That look on your face. I feel my whole body shake…so wait a minute darlin' look into my eyes now. I can't take no more oh no….

Come and get me if you want to…just try to tear this heart apart.


	18. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Crimson red eyes opened to see emerald/gold ones looking at him. It was dark in the room, but they were laying close, facing each other.

"Thank you." Kurama whispered.

"How's your head?" Hiei asked, also keeping his voice low.

"Lonely." Kurama shrugged giving a soft smile.

"_Can you still hear me?"_ Hiei asked mentally.

"_Yes."_ Kurama also nodded.

"_Then you're not alone."_ Hiei said and reached out to pull the red head towards him. They snuggled together, both falling back to sleep.

When the red eyes opened again, the futon was empty. Hiei sat up and looked around the room, finding Kurama sitting on the window sill.

Getting up and going over, Hiei just stood there and watched with Kurama as the sun rose, starting the new day.

The next thing Hiei knew, he was being pulled towards the red head and made to sit between his legs, resting on the sill. He leaned into the red head's chest, placing his head between the shoulder and neck.

"This is different." Hiei muttered as he settled in.

"You need to be held too you know." Kurama said, wrapping his arms around the small figure.

"I'm not complaining." Hiei said.

"I will try to not be a mental burden. I know what you did will put a strain on you." Kurama said.

"It was no big deal, after awhile you will be able to do it yourself and I can back off."

Hiei stated.

The walls that Hiei built needed to be controlled by him, but only for awhile like he said. Soon, when Kurama started his own path, he will forget the other memories, well, not forget, but be able to put them in storage until 'if' and 'when' he needed them.

They sat in the window in silence, until there was a soft knock on the door. It opened to reveal Yukina, carrying a tray of food.

"I thought you might like some breakfast." She said as she came in. Looking up to see them in the window, she blushed. "I'm sorry…I did not mean to interrupt." She placed the tray and bowed, backing out.

"Yukina….wait." Kurama said pushing the fire demon off and getting up. He moved to kneel in front of the ice maiden.

She looked with confusion and shock as the red head lowered his head and said.

"Please forgive me." It was said softly and he looked back up to see her eyes.

"What for?" She said, still confused.

"I had no right to trick you. It was not my place in how you found out Hiei was your brother. He had his reasons and I broke his trust. It was also not fair to you." Kurama said softly and lowered his head again.

"I do not need to forgive you." She said, showing a soft smile that he couldn't see because his head was bowed.

Kurama bit his lip, he had no reason to expect her to forgive him, it was a bad thing he did. He understood and could only hope that someday she would understand. Maybe even someday she could forgive.

"Kurama." She said, taking her small hand and placing it on his shoulder, making him look up into her red eyes

"I can not forgive you for something you did not do." She said. "Youko was the one, not you, but if it will make you feel better…I forgive you." She moved the hand on his shoulder to his cheek. "I'm just so happy that my brother has found someone that makes him as happy as I am with Kazuma." She gleamed.

"Thank you." Kurama said, smiling and placing his hand on hers. Closing his eyes, he added. "I hope to make your brother very happy, if he is willing to let me."

"You will and do, fox." Hiei said and moved to stand behind him. Kurama sighed as he felt the demon's arms wrap around him.

The next think they knew, they were hugging, with Kurama sandwiched between the twins. Soft 'taps' were heard and they pulled apart to see tear gems around them.

Hiei looked at his sister, to see her smiling. "No worries brother, they are happy gems." She said, picking up the few gems and placing them in Kurama's hand.

"These were shed for you, so they are now yours to do with as you please." She said, standing back up and getting ready to leave.

"No." Kurama shook his head and held out his hand containing the gems. "I would feel better if you gave them to Genkai and let her use them for the temple." He said.

"If that is your wish." Yukina said, taking the gems and leaving the two to stare at the tray of food.

They ate in silence, until Hiei asked. "What do you want to do today?"

"What do you want to do?" Kurama asked back.

"Oh no…I asked first, so you have to decided." Hiei said putting his now empty bowl down and leaning back to watch the red head as he tried to think.

"I…I." Kurama didn't know what to say. He didn't have Shuiichi telling him he needed to get home or go to work, he didn't have Youko complaining that he was bored and wanted out. He said the first thing that came to mind. "I want to go home." He finally said.

"We can do that." Hiei smiled.

"What day is it anyways?" Kurama asked, sitting down his empty bowl.

"Tuesday." Hiei answered and watched shock appear on the red head's face.

"I should have gone to work yesterday." Kurama said, getting up and starting to pack the few items he had.

"Calm fox. Genkai called your mother and told her something." Hiei said, still sitting nice and calm.

"What…what did she tell her?" Kurama said there was still had panic in his voice as he looked to the black haired.

Hiei shrugged. "You can go out and ask."

Kurama threw his bag down and left the room. Hiei knew the fox was not upset with him, just the situation.

Kurama found the master sitting at her usual table, drinking tea.

"How are you feeling?" She asked, as he sat down at the table.

"What did you tell my okasan?" Kurama flat out asked.

"I told her I had an emergency and needed your help, along with the others. She didn't question it and even offered to help." Genkai said calmly, taking a sip of tea.

Kurama let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. "Thank you and when did you call her?" He asked.

"Saturday morning." She said.

"Well, I do need to get going. Thank you for everything." He said and went to stand.

"What are your plans?" Genkai asked.

"I really do not have any. I guess go to work and do what I have always been doing." Kurama answered.

"Sounds boring to me." She said, taking a sip of tea, not even looking up at the boy.

"What am I suppose to do." Kurama said.

"Anything you want, you only answer to yourself now." She said.

"I see, well things may change, but for now I do not have any plans so….." He let the sentence trail off.

"Can I give you some advice?" Genkai said, putting her mug down and finally making eye contact.

Kurama sat back down and waited.

"Do what makes you feel happy. Don't think of the affects it will have on Youko or your ningen half, they don't matter anymore. Make your own decisions, what you think is right and what you want to do and most of all." She looked him dead in the eyes. "Let Hiei help you as much as possible. He feels really guilty about what he did and is now trying to make up for his mistakes. Have you two talked?" She asked.

Kurama shook his head 'no.'

"It's going to be awkward, but you two need to have that talk and get his side of the events." She added.

Kurama stood, saying. "Thank you." Leaving her sitting and pouring more tea.

When Kurama made it back to the room, Hiei was already packed and had his things packed as well.

"Ready?" Hiei asked as the red head took in the sight.

"Let us go home." Kurama smiled, grabbing his pack and Hiei's hand.

End Chapter 16

Lyrics to the song: _**Listen to your Heart**_ – by: _Roxette_

I know there something in the wake of your smile. I get the notion from the look in your eyes, yeah. You've built a love, but that love falls apart. Your little piece of heaven turns to dark.

(Course)

Listen to your heart…when he's calling for you…Listen to your heart…there's nothing else you can do. I don't know where you're going and I don't know why, but listen to your heart…before you tell him goodbye.

Sometimes you wonder if this fight is worthwhile. The precious moments are all lost in the tide, yeah. They're swept away and nothing is what it seems. The feeling if belonging to your dreams.

And there are voices…that want to be heard…so much to mention…but you can't find the words…the scent of magic, the beauty that's been when love was wilder than the wind.


	19. Chapter 17

This chapter is rated **M**

Chapter 17

Two weeks have past, since the two became one. Kurama seemed to be doing well. He all but quit work, realizing he didn't like it and wanted something different. He also decided he wanted a house, a house out in the suburbs away from people.

So it was no surprise when Hiei came through the front door, after being gone for a few days to do Mukuro's bidding, to find the red head sitting on the couch surrounded by newspapers and retail flyers.

"Welcome back Amai." Kurama said, putting down the latest paper that was covered in several highlighted circles.

"Any luck?" Hiei asked as he placed his cloak on the back of the couch, but not before taking something out and slipping it in his pants pocket.

"Some leads, I am afraid the housing market is at a stand still. What there is is not much and it is very expensive." Kurama said, standing up and walking over to the fire demon, giving him a welcome home hug.

Hiei let himself be hugged and even returned one of his own. It had taken some time to get use to being 'cuddled' but he was liking it more and more and knew the red head needed to do it.

Kurama pulled the smaller figure's chin up and planted a kiss on the soft red lips.

"I have missed you." Kurama whispered before placing another kiss on his bound jagan.

"It was only two days." Hiei said closing his eyes as another kiss met his lips.

"It was a long two days." Kurama cooed and started rubbing the fire demon's back then going lower to grab his backside, giving it a soft squeeze.

Hiei moaned and pulled back. Showing a smirk, he grabbed the red head's hand and led him to the stairs. "Let's continue upstairs, shall we?"

"Lets." Kurama smiled as he was dragged.

Hiei was starting to like this new side of Kurama, it had taken a few times, but the red head finally seemed to accept and chose what he wanted and liked when it came to them having sex. The first few times had been slow, frustrating and they were both nervous, but it had been worth it. Now Kurama was even initiating the moves to say he wanted sex and Hiei couldn't be happier.

They still hadn't talked. Neither of them seemed to want to bring it up. Hiei thought it was only fair if Kurama did it when he was ready, he didn't want to cause a set back by saying anything. Kurama just seemed to want to forget it and move on. Either way, the fire demon knew that sometime soon it would be brought up and they would have to face it, but for now they just lived day by day. Kurama had told his mother a few things. She seemed to not believe him and even accused Hiei of being the cause. She wasn't too happy to hear that her son was having a gay relationship and had changed his looks. The tension was thick and Hiei didn't know what to do to help. Maybe that was another reason why they hadn't talked. The red head needed to get things settled with his mother first.

Making it through the door, Kurama all but threw the fire demon on the bed. Straddling his hips, the red head continued to plant kisses, ever other one or so, on the lips.

"Wait." Hiei pushed on the lean chest, making the red head stop and look at him with confusion.

"Don't look at me like that. I just want to give you something." He said reaching into his pocket and pulling out a necklace. He placed it around the fox's neck.

"What is this?" Kurama asked, sitting back on his heals, careful not to crush the smaller demon.

"I wanted to give it to you earlier, but it took Yukina longer to make it then she thought it would." Hiei said, watching his fox finger the stone.

The necklace was just like the ones Hiei and Yukina wore.

"I told Yukina I wanted her to give the stones to Genkai." The red head said. He liked it and would always treasure it, but he had not expected the gift.

"It's not one of hers." Hiei said and watched shock wash over the red head's face.

The green eyes went wide. "Then who's…..." He tried to say.

"It's one of mine." Hiei shrugged. "The only one of mine I think, well, that I can remember." He said.

"When…when did you, but who made you…I do not understand." Kurama managed to say still fingering the stone. It was mostly nerves as he tried to understand.

"When Youko left and allowed you to merge. I tried to get in your head and passed out. Yukina said I shed it before I woke up." Hiei said, taking his fingers and playing with the red strands.

"It looks a lot like Yukina's." Kurama said, holding it up.

"Yes, but look here." Hiei said and took hold of the stone to hold it to the light as best he could. "There is a dark spot in the center, it's not pure." He showed him then dropped the necklace, it landed in middle of the red head's chest.

"Well, you are pure to me." Kurama smiled.

"Yukina said that I have a pure heart and soul, just my fire makes me dark." Hiei said.

"I agree." Kurama smiled again. "I will never take it off. I am most honored that you shed this for me and …what would you like as a thank you." He purred and the gold flashed in the green eyes as a mischief smile came to the soft pale lips.

"Um." Hiei didn't get to answer as his body was ravished by hands and lips. He found himself naked and writhing before a thought even came to mind.

"May I?" Kurama purred as he settled between the fire demon's legs.

They had come to ask each other permission before continuing with something that might make them uncomfortable. Although permission was not really needed anymore, they still asked.

Hiei could only nod as his member was taken in the fox's hot mouth and a finger entered him. Gods, he loved the feel of his fox's mouth.

Kurama added a second finger, moving them in preparation to accept him, while still suckling. He finally sat up and reached to the nightstand, grabbing a tube. Coating himself, he moved back into position and ever so slowly sheathed himself, giving the squirming demon time to adjust.

Making eye contact and getting the go ahead, Kurama sat a pace. He started slow, long pulls and thrusts, until Hiei couldn't take it anymore and wrapped his legs around the taller figure, using them to push the fox in and out faster.

"Impatient are we?" Kurama smirked, but picked up his pace. Moans and groans filled the room.

With the feel of the legs wrapped around him, Kurama wasn't going to last long. He reached for the fire demon's erection only to have his hand swatted away.

"Not yet, you finish." Hiei growled, pulling the hair tails on either side of the red head's face.

"Oh…uh." Kurama tried to sit up, but was being held by his hair. Hiei was only allowing him to do deep thrusts and then was holding him in before allowing him to pull out and thrust again.

He lost it, spilling his seed and filling the tight space. It took all of Hiei's will power not to cum with the red head, but he wanted to take his fox.

The taller figure collapsed and both lay sweating and panting. Finally Kurama sat up and looked at Hiei. "Why did you not finish with me?" He asked with sadness in his eyes and voice.

"Because." Hiei flipped them and started ravishing the red head the same way he had been. "I… (kiss) want… (kiss) to…be… (kiss)…in…you." He got out between the kissing.

Kurama squirmed and moaned at the statement and allowed himself to be ravished.

"Roll over." Hiei whispered.

Kurama only nodded and tried to turn over. He finally made it and got on his knees.

Hiei growled and started rubbing the fox's lower back that was an arousal spot. It would seem that even when they merged the spot was still a sensitive area.

The red head gasped, wiggling his behind at the feelings he was experiencing.

"May I continue?" Hiei asked next to the red head's ear.

"Yes." Kurama gasped.

Taking the tube and coating his fingers, Hiei prepared the red head. When he felt he was ready, he put the rest of the gel on his member and slowly sheathed him self.

Kurama moan and hissed as he was being entered. Hiei went slow, stopping when he was all the way in.

"Move." Kurama growled and pushed back with his hips.

"Easy, my fox." Hiei said softly, rubbing the red head's back, trying to relax and sooth the tension he still felt.

"I am not going to break. Move." Kurama ordered, pushing back again.

"Okay." Hiei said, slowing pulling out and thrusting back in hard, causing Kurama to moan and try yet again to push back.

"Impatient are we?" Hiei smirked.

"Just move." Kurama said as sweat rolled off his body.

Hiei sat a pace and it wasn't long before he couldn't hold it any longer. He was surprise he'd lasted as long as he had. Filling the red head with his seed, he all but blacked out. Collapsing on his side, he gulped and panted, before turning to his side to see the red head still laying on his stomach, his head turned away.

"Kurama?" Hiei said, placing a hand on the red head's shoulder.

Kurama rolled over and he was shocked to see tears in the green/gold eyes.

"Did I…did I hurt you?" Hiei asked feeling guilty.

"No." The red head shook his head. "You did not hurt me, Amai…I am happy…like Yukina said, these are happy tears." He said and pulled the smaller figure to him so they could cuddle until both fell asleep.

a)a)a)a

"_Report."_

"_Yes my Lord. It would seem he is on the verge of relocating. We will monitor his movements more closely, so we don't possibly lose him."_

"_You better not."_

"_Yes my Lord."_

"_There is something your not telling me, what is it?"_

"_My Lord…it would seem he has changed his appearance."_

"_How so?"_

"_His hair now has silver streaks in it and they say his eyes are ringed with gold. Um…also his power level is higher then it was before, but not as high if he was Youko."_

"_Interesting…what are you up to my fox?"_

"_Sir…one last thing."_

"_Yes."_

"_The plans you have to get Mistress Taiga out of prison are almost ready…all we need is your go ahead."_

"_Wait…wait just a little longer. If we get my love out too soon then they will have a head start in knowing my plans…a few more days won't make a difference and then we can do everything at once._

"_Yes my Lord."_

End Chapter 17

The End

Continues in: _**Revenge: How Sweet the Sound**_

_Amai_ – meaning - 'sweet, having the taste of sugar, honey, etc.'

Lyrics to the song: _**Possession **_– by: _Sarah McLachlan _

Listen as the wind blows…from across the great divide…voices trapped in yearning…memories trapped in time…the night is my companion…and solitude my guide…would I spend forever here and not be satisfied.

(Course)

And I would be the one to hold you down…kiss you so hard…I'll take your breath away…and after I'd wipe away the tears…just close your eyes dear.

Through his world I've stumbled…so many times betrayed…trying to find a honest word to find…the truth enslaved…oh you speak to me in riddles and you speak to me in rhyme…my body aches to breathe your breath your words keep me alive.

Into this night I wander…its morning that I dread…another day of knowing of…the path I fear to tread…oh into this sea of waking dreams…I follow without pride…nothing stands between us here and I won't be denied.

Just close your eyes


End file.
